Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, the demand of adventurous places has been ascended. More and more travelers visit places with challenging weather like Mount Everest. The pros and cons of this development will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs.

To embark with, there are many benefits of going on such a locations. Firstly, it is very beneficial for the human body as it improves overall cardiovascular stamina, muscle strength, and resistance to harsh weather. Secondly, this kind of dangerous sites will boost person's confidence level as they face difficult situations, which makes them confident enough to take risky actions in life that will provide them with the speedy progress in the forthcoming life. For instance, individuals who learns how to tackle difficulties in the life are more efficient to solve problems and make their career stable and successful.

Despite of this advantages, it also brings some disadvantages. To begin with, this type of dangerous places has so many hazards which puts one's life at jeopardy. To exemplify, many people deceased while climbing mountains due to decline in oxygen level as they climb further, this drop of oxygen ultimately leads to lung collapse and sudden death. Furthermore, visiting this places with extreme cold or hot climate requires prior preparation to be fully equipped for upcoming challenges, which consumes large amount of capital, such as buying shoes, heavy-duty bags, jackets and many more.

To recapitulate, even though going to adventurous places brings some cons such as life long injuries or heavy on budget, it is worth giving a try due to its ample of pros like boosting physical strength and confidence.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme locations. The position is clear throughout, and the ideas are relevant. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat superficial. For example, the point about 'cardiovascular stamina' is mentioned but not fully explored in the context of the specific challenges of the Sahara or Antarctic. The conclusion is a bit repetitive, merely restating the points rather than synthesizing them. To reach a higher band, you should aim to provide more specific, nuanced examples that directly link the 'difficult conditions' mentioned in the prompt to the personal growth or physical risks described.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a distinct focus. You use cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', 'Despite of this', and 'To recapitulate' to guide the reader. However, some of these transitions are slightly mechanical or misused, such as 'Despite of this' (which should be 'Despite these' or 'In spite of these'). Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as 'this kind of dangerous sites' (should be 'these kinds of dangerous sites'). The progression of ideas is generally smooth, but the flow could be improved by using a wider variety of linking phrases.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, including terms like 'cardiovascular stamina', 'jeopardy', and 'forthcoming'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'demand of adventurous places has been ascended' (should be 'demand for... has increased') and 'many people deceased' (should be 'many people have died'). These errors are noticeable but do not prevent the reader from understanding your meaning. To improve, focus on learning the correct collocations for common verbs and adjectives, and avoid using overly complex words if you are not entirely sure of their usage.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement and pluralization, such as 'this kind of dangerous sites' and 'visiting this places'. There are also errors in preposition usage and verb forms, such as 'individuals who learns' (should be 'learn') and 'Despite of this'. While these errors are frequent, they rarely impede communication. To achieve a higher band, you need to demonstrate more consistent control over basic grammar, especially with plurals and subject-verb agreement, and increase the variety of error-free complex structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.