Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

There has been significant increase on visitors specially ecologically vulnerable and difficult places like Sahara desert and the Antarctic. Which contributing on economy and generating huge number of employment opportunities however, it is causing global ecosystem degradation and pollution. This essay will explain the advantages and disadvantages of this situation with relevant reasons and examples.

The Primary benefits of tourism is rise in countries GDP. Adventure tourism has been growing over the years and many nations are making massive proportion of there GDP through this way. Where people travels numerous places with limited facilities and resources. For example, Nepal total revenue is around 30-50 billions dollars per year, where as Everest climbing itself consists between 30-40 percentage. Which is one of the toughest mountain expedition in the world. As a result, majority of the population who is living near this destinations running the business and creating employment opportunities.

Primarily there are two drawbacks of visiting the places where limited resources are available. Firstly, environmental damage. Without adequate resources it is really hard to manage the population . In a long run it break down ecosystem. Hence, animals living in that places either died or extinct because of the encroachments by tourism. Secondly, waste management is another critical issue in these tourist areas due to lack of manpower and infrastructure. For instance, huge amount of trash has been releasing over the years through the cruise which travels through the Antarctica in summer due to lack of equipment to track them back to the countries.

In conclusion, Pros of tourism in difficult spots are growth of economy through the business and employment opportunities, however it contributes pollution and ecosystem damage on other side.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of adventure tourism in difficult environments. The position is clear from the introduction, and the main ideas are relevant. However, the development is somewhat uneven. While the example of Nepal is specific, the explanation of environmental damage is a bit general. The conclusion is quite brief and merely restates the prompt rather than synthesizing the arguments effectively. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully extended with more nuanced analysis rather than just listing consequences.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'In conclusion', which help the reader follow the argument. However, there are instances where the flow is interrupted by grammatical errors or awkward phrasing, such as the sentence fragment 'Which contributing on economy...' and the repetitive use of 'Which' to start sentences. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and the transition between ideas could be smoother to improve the overall progression of the essay.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the student to convey their meaning. There are some attempts at topic-specific vocabulary like 'ecologically vulnerable', 'expedition', and 'encroachments'. However, there are several errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'massive proportion of there GDP' (should be 'a large share of their GDP') and 'trash has been releasing' (should be 'trash has been released'). These errors are noticeable but do not prevent the reader from understanding the main points.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('The Primary benefits... is', 'animals... either died or extinct'), incorrect preposition usage ('increase on visitors'), and sentence fragments ('Which contributing on economy...'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar limits the score. Focusing on sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would significantly improve the quality.

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