Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Nowadays people like to go an visit the area where situation are more difficult like the Antarctic or Sahara desert.

There are several advantages for people to see such place. Firstly, by visiting such place we can increase the tourism by which it can help the local community to earn some wages during this period of time. Secondly, the government can also help to develop such place if their is tourists who like to see which they have not seen other place. For example, in my village their is was a small lake but all the member of village decide to develop the lake as well as around the lake by it increase the impact in tourism.

However, despite many advantages, I also believe their are many drawbacks. First, due to more and more tourists the area where their is different condition to manage large number of people visiting the same place at a time. In addition, the place like Sahara desert where their will be no such facility for visitor like restraunt, restroom and hotel. Furthermore, in any emergency due to remote area it can carry out huge pocket bills. For example, in a panic situation we cannot handle large number of people at a time and we cannot rescue all at a same time which can cause more sever effect to all of them.

In Conclusion, although many problem are their but i think that positive one outshine them. Because, it can help both the government and the local community to grow up.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme locations. However, the development of ideas is limited. The points regarding local economic growth and government development are relevant but lack depth. The disadvantages section touches on infrastructure and safety, but the explanation is somewhat repetitive and vague, particularly the point about 'huge pocket bills' and 'panic situations'. To achieve a higher band, you should provide more specific examples or elaborate on the consequences of these issues. The position is clear, but the overall development remains superficial, which is characteristic of a Band 5.0 response.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use basic cohesive devices like 'Firstly', 'Secondly', 'However', and 'In conclusion'. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes hindered by awkward phrasing and mechanical transitions. For instance, the transition 'by which it can help' is grammatically incorrect and disrupts the flow. Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'the area where their is different condition to manage large number of people'. While the essay is coherent enough to be understood, the lack of sophisticated linking and occasional confusion in sentence structure limits the score to a 5.5.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. You frequently use simple words like 'place', 'help', and 'good'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'huge pocket bills' (which is non-standard) and 'sever effect'. You attempt to use some topic-specific vocabulary like 'tourism' and 'emergency', but the range is insufficient to express complex ideas precisely. Spelling errors, such as 'restraunt' and 'their' (used incorrectly for 'there'), are present. To improve, you should focus on learning collocations and using a wider variety of descriptive adjectives and nouns related to travel and environment.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a high frequency of grammatical errors that occasionally impede meaning. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement ('all the member of village decide'), article usage, and the misuse of 'their' instead of 'there'. Sentence structures are mostly simple or contain errors when you attempt complex constructions, such as 'the area where their is different condition to manage large number of people'. Punctuation is also inconsistent. While the meaning is generally recoverable, the high density of basic errors in almost every sentence prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on mastering basic sentence construction before attempting more complex structures.

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