Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

MORE EXTREME DESTINATIONS LIKE DESERTS AND POLAR REGIONS ARE BECOMING POPULAR TOURIST SPOTS. WHILE VISITING SUCH CHALLENGING PLACES CAN OFFER UNIQUE EXPERIENCE, IT ALSO COMES WITH SERIOUS DRAWBACK.

FIRSTLY, TOURIST GET TO SEE LANDSCAPES THEY CAN'T SEE ANYWHERE ELSE. EXAMPLE; NORTHERN LIGHTS IN ANTARCTICA, MASSIVE SAND DUNES IN SAHARA. ALSO THERE ARE SOME SENCE OF ACHIEVEMENT AND ADVENTURE. IT PUSHES PEOPLE OUT OF THEIR COMFORT ZONE. IT HAS MANY EDUCATIONAL VALUE ONE CAN LEARN ABOUT IT CLIMATE, WILDLIFE AND GEOGRAPHY FIRST-HAND OF THINGS YOU CAN FIND EASILY.

ON THE OTHER HAND, BECAUSE OF THE EXTREME WEATHER CONDITION THAT IS HEATSTROKE IN SAHARA AND FROSTBITE IN ANTARCTIC, THE SAFETY OF OUR HEALTH MAY BE AT RICKS. FOR EXAMPLE, ONE MAY DECIDE TO VISIT SAHARA DESERT, WHEN HE OR SHE THINKS ABOUT THE HARSH WEATHER AND THE RISK TO HE OR HER, THEY MAY NOT GO AGAIN. ALSO IF ANY THING GOES WRONG, HELP IS FAR AWAY, BASED ON NO LIMITED MEDICAL FACILITIES.

AGAIN, HUMAN PRESENCE CAN DAMAGE FRAGILE ECOSYSTEMS. FOOTPRINTS ON ANTARCTIC ICE OR DISTURBANCE TO DESERT WILDLIFE CAN HAVE LONG-LASTING EFFECTS. FINALLY, THESE TRIPS ARE EXTREMELY EXPENSIVE AND REQUIRE SPECIALIZED EQUIPMENT, MAKING THEM INACCESSIBLE TO MOST PEOPLE. THE LONG FLIGHTS ALSO CONTRIBUTE SIGNIFICANTLY TO CARBON EMISSIONS.

IN CONCLUSION, ALTHOUGH VISITING DIFFICULT DESTINATIONS CAN BE REWARDING AND EYE-OPENING, THE RISKS TO BOTH TOURISTS AND THE ENVIRONMENT SUGGEST THAT THIS TYPE OF TOURISM MUST BE STRICTLY REGULATED TO MINIMIZE HARM.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme locations. However, the essay falls short of the 250-word minimum requirement, which negatively impacts the development of ideas. While the main points are relevant, some arguments, such as the educational value or the impact on ecosystems, are presented in a list-like fashion rather than being fully explored or supported with detailed examples. The position is clear, but the lack of depth due to the word count constraint prevents a higher score. To improve, ensure each point is expanded with a specific scenario or consequence to meet the length requirement and demonstrate deeper critical thinking.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, with a standard introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical, and the flow between sentences is occasionally choppy. For instance, the transition between the benefits of education and the risks of weather could be smoother. The use of referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the sentence 'one may decide to visit Sahara desert, when he or she thinks about the harsh weather... they may not go again', which is confusingly phrased.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks sophistication. There are several instances of imprecise word choice, such as 'sence of achievement' (sense), 'at ricks' (at risk), and 'no limited medical facilities' (limited). While the student attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'fragile ecosystems' and 'carbon emissions', the overall range is limited. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding repetitive phrasing. The errors in spelling and word formation do not impede communication, but they are noticeable throughout the text.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('the Sahara', 'the Antarctica'), subject-verb agreement ('tourist get'), and pronoun usage ('he or her'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with misused semicolons and missing commas. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from being considered 'error-free' in the majority of sentences. Focusing on basic grammatical accuracy and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would significantly improve the quality of the writing.

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