Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-21
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.
What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
It has been argued that nowadays tourists are choosing to visit challenging destinations such as Sahara Desert or Antartica to explore and experience the thril. This essay will examine the postive aspects and drawbacks of this trend in detail.
One of the major why tourist prefer to visit such destinations is because it improves their personal growth and it boost thier confidence. people are pushed out of thier comfort zones when they travel to such destinations facing difficult conditions make them become more resilient confident and stronger psychologically and mentally. To exemplify, tourists largely take part in desert safari and antartic expeditions to cope up with the extreme conditions and unusual surroundings and this helps them make strong and boost thier confidence with in them. Therefore, travelling to such destinations helps people to come out of their current state.
Another important benefit of this trend people can learn and get to experience the beauty of nature and learn different ecosystems, wildlife and environmental conditions. This actually creates an awareness as to what all we have in the ecosystem that we live in.
On the other hand, one major drawback of visiting such destinations is it contains extreme risks to own's safety. Due to extreme weather conditions, lack of medical assistance such trips could prove to be fatal. To exemplify, lots of tourist every year loose thier lives in Sahara deserts and Antartic expeditions due to high and low tempretures. Another important disadvantage is these trips are highly expensive because of the equipment , travelling and accomodations cost so not all the people can afford to book such thrilling trips.
In conclusion, Athough visting such desitnation improves personal growth and confidence but it also cannot ignore the drawbacks of it as its is extremely risky and expensive.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting challenging destinations. The ideas are relevant, such as personal growth and safety risks. However, the development of these points is somewhat superficial. For instance, the explanation of why these trips improve confidence is repetitive, and the discussion on environmental awareness is underdeveloped. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific, nuanced examples or deeper analysis of the implications of these trends. The position is clear throughout, but the conclusion is slightly abrupt and could better synthesize the main points discussed in the body paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. There is a basic progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or repetitive (e.g., 'Another important benefit', 'Another important disadvantage'). Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'This actually creates an awareness as to what all we have in the ecosystem', where the connection to the previous point is weak. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the flow of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'resilient', 'expeditions', and 'fatal'. However, there are several spelling errors ('thril', 'postive', 'thier', 'tempretures', 'desitnation') and some awkward collocations ('cope up with', 'make strong'). These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the score. To improve, focus on proofreading for common spelling mistakes and expanding your use of topic-specific collocations. Using more precise vocabulary instead of general terms like 'good' or 'bad' will help you achieve a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('one of the major why tourist prefer', 'tourist... loose thier lives') and missing articles or prepositions. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly in the conclusion. While you attempt complex sentences, they often contain errors that distract the reader. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and ensuring that your verb forms and pluralization are consistent throughout the text.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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