Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.
What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Nowadays, many tourists are visiting some harsh places as an adventure, such as the Sahara desert and Antarctic. They have difficult conditions. In this essay, I will discuss the advanteges and disadvanteges of visiting these places.
On the one hand, a lot of many prefer to discover and explore new places and activities. They like to experience new adventures and challenges in such harsh place like the Sahara desert and Antarctic. It is a good idea for those who enjoy challenges and hard conditions of these places. It can enhance their creativity and productivity in their lives, also it improves many social and personal skills. For example, trying to spend time in some places with hard conditions, it helps the person to be patient and gratitude.
On the other hand, visiting such places with difficult conditions can be harmful for the tourists. It can lead to the appearance of some illnesses and health problems. Due to the harsh weather in those places, such as hot weather in the Sahara desert can lead to some respiratory problems. Moreover, the cold atmosphere in Antarctic is also harsh and it can affect the human body. For instance, the blood circulation in the body can be decreased and caused health issues. The conditions in those places can affect the mental and physical well-being of the visitors.
In conclusion, visiting such difficult places, it can be a hobby for the people who know how to deal with its hard conditions. However, it can be harmful for those visitors also.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting harsh environments. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention that such trips can 'enhance creativity' and 'improve social skills,' these points are not fully explained or supported with concrete examples. Similarly, the health risks are mentioned, but the explanation remains quite general. To reach a higher band, you should aim to expand on your points with more specific reasoning or illustrative examples. The position is clear, but the overall depth of the argument is basic.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand,' 'On the other hand,' and 'Moreover' to signal shifts in your argument. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical, and there are instances where the flow is slightly repetitive, such as the repeated mention of the Sahara and Antarctic. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that sentences within paragraphs are more tightly connected would help improve the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. You use basic terms like 'harsh places,' 'difficult conditions,' and 'health problems' repeatedly. There are also some spelling errors, such as 'advanteges' and 'disadvanteges,' which should be avoided. To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to travel, environment, and physical well-being. For example, instead of 'hard conditions,' you could use 'extreme environments' or 'inhospitable climates.'
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'a lot of many prefer' (incorrect quantifier usage), 'caused health issues' (incorrect verb tense), and 'visiting such difficult places, it can be' (redundant subject). Punctuation is generally functional, but the sentence construction often feels slightly awkward. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and avoiding redundant pronouns will significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.
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