Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this contemporary era, exploring to new places plays a significant role. There is an ongoing debate about numerous visitors are travelling in adventure areas such as Sahara desert and the Antarctic. Although these places provide unique and exciting experiences, they can also involve with several risks and difficulties.

This essay will explain both positive and negative effects in the upcoming paragraphs.

On the one hand, one of the major advantages is travelling provides new experience as everyone visit unique places they feel fortunate and delighted. For instance, individuals get frustered from their busy schedule and if they visit adventure places can experience relaxed and kind of fun in their life. Moreover, in unique places such as sahara desert and the antarctic, people can see rare animals like penguins. As a result, people do not only gain independency and new experience but also can see rare animals.

On the other hand, these kind of trips give some drawbacks also. First of all, people suffer from some risks in these places. They may feel very high temperature in Sahara desert and low temperature in the Antarctic. Which cause people get illness and may suffer some diseases. Furthermore, these trips are also very expensives. Some people suffer from financial issues. Sometime, they have to buy some equipments for hiking and safety.

In conclusion, undoubtedly, there are numerous merits as people feel freedom and enjoy new places but also have negative points as financial issues and risks for like.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The essay addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme environments, fulfilling the core requirements of the prompt. However, the response is slightly under the 250-word minimum, which limits the depth of development. While the ideas are relevant, they are somewhat superficial. For instance, the discussion on 'risks' and 'financial issues' is brief and lacks specific, well-developed examples. To achieve a higher band, you should expand on your points with more detailed explanations or concrete illustrations. Additionally, the conclusion is quite abrupt and does not fully synthesize the arguments presented. The position is clear, but the overall development is constrained by the brevity of the response.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'Moreover' are used to signal the transition between ideas. However, the flow is sometimes mechanical, and the use of referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'Which cause people get illness', where the relative pronoun does not clearly link to the previous clause. Paragraphing is present, but the development within the paragraphs is limited, making the overall progression feel somewhat repetitive. Improving the variety of linking words would help the essay flow more naturally.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms like 'fun', 'good', and 'unique'. There are also some errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'exploring to new places' (should be 'exploring new places') and 'involve with several risks' (should be 'involve several risks'). Spelling errors like 'frustered' (frustrated) and 'equipments' (equipment is uncountable) also occur. To improve, focus on using more sophisticated vocabulary and ensuring that words are used in their correct grammatical context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the reader's understanding, such as 'everyone visit unique places they feel fortunate' (missing conjunctions/punctuation) and 'Which cause people get illness' (fragmented sentence). Subject-verb agreement and article usage are inconsistent throughout the text. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and ensuring that complex sentences are constructed with correct subordinate clauses.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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