Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Risk-taker individuals are increasingly nowadays. They normally want to go to places that no ordinary people would visit. Their bravery and fashion on going to extreme and harsh condition area are second to none.

On one hand, the things that this extreme tourist are very beneficial not only to the individuals but also to the community. The local community will be gained income not only to the government but also to the natives who are near the tourist area. Locals can assist the tourist and have some extra income while the local government can create funds through different fees such as environmental fee and sanitary fee. The tourist spot will increase its popularity due to the outsiders vlogging and content creating. Mostly, it will be knowledgeable to others to see in different flatforms of social media the extreme area and harsh places.

On the other hand, the individuals who are visiting those difficult areas to visit are endangering their lives because they can encounter different animals that are dangerous in wild. The weather condition on that area is difficult to adopt due to its extreme conditions. Lastly, vacationists are not protected to the illness that they can get due to its different types of environments.

In my conclusion, I believe that every human has a choice to make, on how will they make their lives happy and vibrant for them. They have their every rights to do what ever they want as long as it follows the rule of law and obey the teaching of our creator.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of extreme tourism. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the point about 'local community' gaining income is relevant but lacks specific examples or depth. The discussion on disadvantages, such as weather and illness, is also quite brief. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your points with more detailed explanations or concrete examples. The conclusion does not directly summarize the main points regarding the benefits and drawbacks, but rather shifts to a philosophical statement about personal choice, which is slightly off-topic for the specific question asked.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use basic cohesive devices like 'On one hand' and 'On the other hand' to signal shifts in the argument. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and some transitions are missing or awkward, such as the jump from 'vlogging' to 'knowledgeable to others'. The use of referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the second paragraph where the connection between the tourist spot's popularity and the local government's funds could be more smoothly linked. Improving the variety of linking words would enhance the overall flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward word choices or non-standard collocations, such as 'fashion on going' instead of 'passion for visiting', 'flatforms' instead of 'platforms', and 'vacationists' which is less common in this context. You rely on some repetitive phrasing, such as 'extreme and harsh condition area'. To improve, focus on using more natural collocations and a wider range of topic-specific vocabulary related to tourism and environmental challenges.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'Risk-taker individuals are increasingly nowadays' (incorrect word order/usage), 'the things that this extreme tourist are very beneficial' (subject-verb agreement error), and 'not protected to the illness' (incorrect preposition). Punctuation is generally functional, but the sentence construction often feels unnatural. You need to focus on subject-verb agreement, correct preposition usage, and ensuring that your complex sentences are grammatically sound to improve your score in this criterion.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.