Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recent years, tourism has taken a different turn from the usual exotic site seeing as tourists are more interested than ever in visiting places that the conditions are harsh. There are a plethora of reasons to explain this new trend. This essay will discuss the advantages and risks for tourists who visit such places.

The benefits of visiting places with difficult conditions include satisfying the curiosity of the tourist. A lot of stories have been heard about to unfavourable the conditions of some place such as the Sahara desert, some tourist travel there to have hands on experience which can redirect how they view the world and give and insight on how resilient humans generally are. Another reason may be for the adrenaline rush and to experience something that is totally different from the usual. This helps them to develop survival skills, sharpen their focus, keep them in a state of optimum physical health, learn the culture of the people there and make them feel alive as they embark on the adventure.

The disadvantages included threat to health. Being exposed to extreme heat or cold can lead to heat stroke or frost bite respectfully, these conditions are very painful and recovery make take a long time depending on the extent of injury hence defeating the very purpose of the visit. Another downside is the risk of death, it may be difficult for some tourist to adapt to such hard conditions especially if the tourist is not in an excellent state of health thereby leading to loss of life in a very painful and excruciating way an example are the numerous dead bodies found on Mount Everest.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The essay addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of extreme tourism. The ideas are relevant, such as personal growth and adrenaline for benefits, and health risks for disadvantages. However, the development is somewhat superficial. For instance, the point about 'survival skills' is mentioned but not explained in the context of the Sahara or Antarctic. The response covers all parts of the prompt, but the arguments could be more deeply explored with more specific examples or logical extensions to reach a higher band. The position is clear, but the overall depth of analysis is limited.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the argument. There is a logical progression from the introduction to the benefits and then the disadvantages. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'A lot of stories have been heard about to unfavourable the conditions'. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. While the paragraphing is appropriate, the internal cohesion within paragraphs needs more variety and precision to move beyond a band 6.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to communicate their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as 'plethora', 'resilient', and 'excruciating'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'exotic site seeing' (sightseeing) and 'respectfully' (respectively). These errors do not impede communication, but they indicate a lack of precision. To improve, the student should focus on learning collocations and ensuring that words are used in their correct context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, including issues with word order ('about to unfavourable the conditions'), subject-verb agreement, and punctuation. For example, the sentence 'an example are the numerous dead bodies' contains a subject-verb disagreement. There are also run-on sentences and comma splices, such as 'frost bite respectfully, these conditions are very painful'. These errors occur frequently and occasionally distract the reader, though they do not prevent the message from being understood.

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