Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In today's era, a lot of visitors visiting the places like Sahara desert or the Antarctic, where the weather conditions are on alarming rate. There are multiple positives as well as some disadvantages for tourist who are traveling in that area, and this will explain further in the following paragraphs.

To start with, there are some advantages of vising those places. Firstly, they will learn adaption while surviving the worst condition. Travelers who are visiting those places are the may be the influencers, so they will make the videos of that place and some how they will include everything in theirs blogs like how to survive, what to eat in that condition, as a result, this all blog will be watched by their followers, and they will know about what to do in that difficult condition. For example, Man as wild is a show telecasting on Discovery Platform where- he is giving all the information about survival.

On the other hand, there are some disadvantages too. First, it is a life threating for them, when the conditions become worst they are unable to do anything without the strongest support. Secondly, some of the tourist many damage that place which worsen their condition too. To explain this, tourist visit that place and detoriate the climate by doing camp fire which lead to deploitation of the nature. For example, wild fire in the forest because of the tourist activity.

In conclusion, tourist visiting at desert and Antarctic where the conditions are worst have some benefits like they can learn adaption and they are the one telling their followers what to do in worst condition, but it can not be denied that tourist are the one who make the condition worst by doing restricted activity over there even though it is life threating to them or local public too.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme environments. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the benefit of 'learning adaptation' is mentioned but not clearly explained in a way that relates to the average tourist. The example of 'Man vs Wild' is relevant but slightly tangential as it focuses on professional survivalists rather than tourists. The disadvantages are better supported, though the link between tourism and 'wild fire' is a bit general. To improve, you should provide more specific, logical explanations for how these experiences impact the individual tourist or the environment.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs with a clear introduction and conclusion. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'To start with', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' to signal the structure. However, the flow within paragraphs is sometimes mechanical, and some sentences are disjointed, such as the transition between the influencer example and the survival show. Referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the final paragraph where the pronoun usage makes the argument slightly repetitive. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would help raise this score.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, including terms like 'influencers', 'survival', and 'deteriorate'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and spelling errors that hinder precision, such as 'deploitation' (likely meaning exploitation or depletion), 'detoriate', and 'life threating'. Some phrases are repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'worst condition' or 'that place'. To achieve a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and ensuring that less common vocabulary is used accurately rather than just attempted.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but accuracy is inconsistent. There are frequent errors in article usage ('the Sahara desert', 'the Antarctic'), subject-verb agreement ('tourist who are traveling'), and sentence construction ('this all blog will be watched'). Some sentences are run-on or lack necessary punctuation, which occasionally forces the reader to re-read for clarity. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the high frequency of grammatical slips prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence structure and proofreading for common errors would be highly beneficial.

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