Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

These days tourism is invading among all generations and people wants to explore anything and everything leading to visiting places where situations are difficult result in making situations worse. People wants to visit to the places like Sahara desert or Antarctic where life is tough to get an hands on experience to survive which often leads to their suffering because their body is not adapted to that environment.

According to my perspective, going to such places have both beneficial and adverse effects. Focusing on beneficial effects, going to places like Sahara desert or the Antarctic, one can explore the different environment, can foresee the different vegetation, wildlife and culture. For instance, once I visited desert region it was all together a wonderful experience to live across the region which is different from urban life.

Looking upon the adverse effects, going to such places without carrying the desired the equipment such as medicines, safety gears and proper knowledge about their weather and adaptation often leads to problems. I still remember a childhood incident when I went to the vacation with my family to place where the climate was too cold and oxygen level was low. My mother is asthmatic and she had difficulty in breathing, thankfully we had her medicines and oxygen mask so we could help her.

I believe that there is nothing wrong to explore extreme places that one should plan and organize ourselves to the situations that one could encounter to visit places so that experience is worth.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme environments. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat superficial. While you mention exploring different environments and wildlife as benefits, and the lack of equipment as a disadvantage, these points could be expanded with more depth and specific examples. The personal anecdote about your mother is relevant, but the essay would benefit from a more balanced discussion of the broader societal or environmental implications of such tourism. The position is clear, but the overall argument lacks the depth required for a higher band score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'According to my perspective', 'For instance', and 'Looking upon the adverse effects' to guide the reader. However, the transitions between sentences are sometimes mechanical, and there is a lack of variety in the linking words used. Additionally, some sentences are slightly disjointed, such as the opening sentence which is quite long and grammatically cluttered, making the flow of ideas less smooth than it could be.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'vegetation', 'wildlife', and 'adaptation'. However, there are instances of awkward phrasing and word choice, such as 'invading among all generations' and 'get an hands on experience'. These errors do not impede communication, but they highlight a limited range of vocabulary. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding repetitive or slightly unnatural phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('people wants', 'going to such places have') and article usage ('the Sahara desert', 'the vacation'). While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your points, they are persistent and indicate a lack of control over complex structures. Improving your proofreading to catch basic agreement and article errors would significantly enhance the quality of your writing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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