Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-21
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.
What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Visitors are attracted to the most challenging regions like Antarctic and Sahara desert area.
The disadvantage of visiting most remote areas are increasingly acknowledged compared to its merits, because people gradually decline from taking unnecessary and unpaid risk.
It is always fun to travel and visit different places when you have the opportunity. People spend lots of time and resources travelling around regions like Sahara desert and the Antarctic area. In addition, visitors spend little time around the space, but make it an annual habit to see strange places once a year. The reasons why most tourist visit these areas are because of its dryness and the beautiful landscape with natural habitants.
However, I believe it is more beneficial to stay away from this areas, or create restrictions to discourage people from visiting these regions. Furthermore, proper sensitization will be given to tourist visiting these regions. Visitors who are not equipped with health and safety precautions required to visit this areas should be denied access. Because, there has been past stories of incidents relating to missing families, people collapsing due to dehydration. More recently, I read on the news, about a couple that collapse during there visit to the Antarctic region, due to the cooler differential body system experienced. Moreover, tourist are not often informed of the quick temperature change in the Antarctic area, so people become victims of the unknown. This is as a result of tourist not been educated properly, and the outcome becomes a disadvantage to others.
In all, I will totally agree that the disadvantage has more weight from the above discussion compared to its merits.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt by discussing the perceived benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme regions like the Sahara desert and the Antarctic. Your position is stated that disadvantages outweigh benefits, noting reasons such as health risks and lack of preparation. However, the ideas lack sufficient depth and extension. For example, while you mention that 'visitors spend little time around the space' and refer to 'natural habitants', these points are somewhat unclear or underdeveloped. To reach a higher band, the discussion of both benefits and disadvantages needs more detailed support, such as exploring economic advantages for local tourism industries alongside the safety and environmental hazards.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is divided into paragraphs, and an overall progression is attempted, moving from an introduction to benefits, disadvantages, and a conclusion. However, cohesion is frequently mechanical or faulty. Cohesive devices such as 'In addition', 'However', 'Furthermore', and 'Moreover' are overused or used inappropriately to start consecutive sentences, disrupting the natural flow. Additionally, referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the sentence 'stay away from this areas', where pronoun agreement fails. Paragraphing is present, but the internal logical links between sentences occasionally feel disjointed, which pulls the score down into the mid-range.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but it is somewhat limited and repetitive. You attempt some less common vocabulary items such as 'sensitization', 'dehydration', and 'differential body system', but there are noticeable word choice and spelling errors, such as writing 'natural habitants' instead of 'habitats', and 'there visit' instead of 'their visit'. Additionally, phrases like 'cooler differential body system experienced' are awkward and imprecise. While communication of your core ideas is not severely impeded, the frequency of lexical inaccuracies prevents the response from achieving a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but control over grammar and punctuation is inconsistent. There are several noticeable grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues in 'The disadvantage... are increasingly acknowledged' and 'this areas' instead of 'these areas'. Furthermore, there are fragment issues and punctuation errors, such as starting a sentence with 'Because, there has been past stories...' and the error 'tourist not been educated properly'. While you attempt complex structures, the frequent occurrence of errors in basic grammar and article usage can cause occasional difficulty and distraction for the reader.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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