Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

It's true that nowadays tourists are used to like visit places with difficult conditions . There is a huge reason behind this . Most of the tourist who are usually visiting such places are Gen Z . Mostly todays generation like's taking chalenges also they are mostly depressed because of many things . They can't simply express . That's the reason why the mostly choose such of extrem places . There is a tendency of choosing places like desert , forest , sea etc . However it has some pros and cons . Some time when they finally can able to get where they want to the the feel kind of mental peach . Also they can have fun buy the adventure and in the end they can find a new meaning of life . and it is is good for his mental and physical health . But there always is a fear of life also . Some time the situation can be worst . Maybe the weather get bad or may be the advencher get suffering . some time many tourist lost there life because of the bad weather . I also have a experience of such visit . I visited the palace in our country called Sazek velly . It is a palace of mountains. There are small sheds on the top of the mountains also there are some water falls . Tourist have to be patient when the are try to go on top . I have experienced many thigs by this single visit .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting difficult tourist destinations, earning a solid mid-level score. However, the ideas remain somewhat limited and under-developed. For instance, the writer mentions that tourists might find 'mental peach' and fun through adventure, but these points are explained with very basic reasoning and generalized assumptions about generations rather than elaborated with strong, well-supported arguments. While there is an attempt to address the prompt fully, the lack of depth in exploring both sides keeps the content restricted. A personal example is provided at the end regarding 'Sazek velly', but it remains largely descriptive rather than analytically tied back to the main thesis on benefits and disadvantages. To reach a higher standard, the writer needs to present fully extended ideas with clear supporting explanations and relevant examples that directly address the core question without relying on overly simplistic generalizations.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The text demonstrates some organisation, but it lacks a clear overall progression and effective paragraphing. The response is presented as a single dense block of text rather than being divided into logical paragraphs for the introduction, benefits, disadvantages, and conclusion. Cohesive devices are either missing, inadequate, or repetitive, making the flow somewhat mechanical. For example, sentences frequently start with conversational or repetitive transitional phrases like 'Also', 'That's the reason why', and 'Some time', which fails to guide the reader smoothly through a logical argument. Pronoun referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as shifting between 'they', 'he', and 'the' without precise antecedents. To improve, the writer should structure the essay into distinct paragraphs that separate the different themes of the prompt and use a wider range of appropriate cohesive devices to connect ideas logically and clearly throughout the response.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for the task. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary items related to the topic, such as 'extreme places', 'depression', and 'adventure', but these are accompanied by noticeable errors in word choice, spelling, and word formation that can cause some difficulty for the reader. For instance, words like 'chalenges', 'extrem', 'peach' (peace), 'buy' (by), 'worst' (worse), 'advencher', 'suffering' (suffering), 'thigs' (things), and 'palace' (place) reflect frequent spelling and lexical inaccuracies. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the general gist of the argument, the frequent lexical errors restrict the precision and clarity of the message. To achieve a higher band, the writer must expand their vocabulary range, ensure correct word forms and collocations, and eliminate basic spelling mistakes through careful proofreading.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response displays a limited range of grammatical structures, relying mostly on simple sentences alongside frequent attempts at complex structures that are often faulty. There are frequent errors in verb forms, tenses, subject-verb agreement, and articles throughout the text, which can cause difficulty and distraction for the reader. Examples of grammatical lapses include 'tourists are used to like visit', 'todays generation like's taking chalenges', 'they finally can able to get', 'the weather get bad', and 'when the are try to go'. Additionally, punctuation and sentence boundary issues are apparent, such as comma splices and run-on phrasing. To progress to a higher level, the writer needs to demonstrate a greater variety of error-free complex sentence patterns and pay closer attention to basic grammatical rules, including verb complementation, auxiliary verbs, and tense consistency.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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