Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-20
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.
What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
In today's rapidly changing world, visiting dangerous places such as Sahara desert and Antarctic has become extermely popular. While some people believe that such destinations offers unique experiences, other argue that both aeras are exposed to extreme weather conditions.This essay will examine both perspectives before presenting my own view.
To begin with, there are several reasons why people support these challanging destinations.The primary benefit is that tourists can explore unique landscapes, galciers and exortic aminals. This is because these environuments offer unique opportunitties for to discover wildlife wich can lead to enhace greater knowledge and unforgetable experiences. For example,
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0
The opening identifies the topic and signals an intention to discuss both sides, but the response does not fulfil the task: it gives only a brief, partly developed benefit and does not explain any disadvantages or present a clear concluding view. The example begins with “For example,” but is left unfinished, so the main point about wildlife and learning is not supported. The response also falls 151 words short of the required minimum, leaving too little space to address both parts with reasons and relevant examples. To improve, explain at least one concrete benefit and one risk—such as seeing rare environments versus exposure to severe weather—and develop each with a specific example before stating your overall view.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an introductory paragraph is followed by a body paragraph, and phrases such as “To begin with” and “For example” signal the intended progression. However, the argument stops abruptly at the unfinished example, and there is no paragraph addressing disadvantages or a conclusion, so the overall progression is incomplete. Some links between ideas are also unclear: the sentence beginning “This is because” does not clearly explain how discovering wildlife leads to greater knowledge and memorable experiences. Build a complete structure with an introduction, separate paragraphs for benefits and disadvantages, and a conclusion. Use linking phrases to show the relationship between each reason and its supporting example.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The response attempts some topic-specific vocabulary, including “unique landscapes,” “extreme weather conditions,” “wildlife,” and “destinations,” which helps establish the subject. However, frequent spelling errors and inaccurate word forms make the vocabulary less reliable, as in “extermely,” “challanging,” “galciers,” “exortic aminals,” and “environuments.” Some phrasing is also unnatural or imprecise: “opportunitties for to discover wildlife” and “enhace greater knowledge” do not express the intended ideas clearly. Aim to use a smaller set of accurate, natural expressions rather than attempting many words without checking them. Proofread spelling and word forms, and practise collocations such as “gain knowledge” and “observe wildlife.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response shows an attempt to use both a complex opening sentence with “While” and a reason clause beginning “This is because,” alongside simpler statements. However, grammatical control is uneven. In “such destinations offers,” the plural subject requires a plural verb; “other argue” also needs a plural form, and “opportunities for to discover” has an incorrect infinitive pattern. The sentence “This is because these environments offer …” becomes difficult to follow because its clause structure is not controlled. There are also punctuation and spacing problems, including a missing space after “conditions.” and before “The.” To improve, check subject–verb agreement, use either “opportunities to discover” or “opportunities for discovering,” and keep complex sentences shorter until their structure is secure.
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