Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Nowadays more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

Firstly i think that the sahara has gratefull effects this is there are people who like discovering historical places in shara as a result they make sure that the sahara has many strange secrets. However sahara can be difficult to visit because of weather in the summer as a consequence they can't be comfortable when they do their activities. on the other hand The Antarctic is a wonderful place when people can enjoy with view so they can relax . Moreover it can't be visitable in the winter because of the colding weather and climate change as a result they can't be enjoying.

in conclusion i think both of places are best for a good holiday but i believe that the weather or the season doesn't matter if we like this place

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You address both benefits and disadvantages by mentioning historical discovery in the Sahara and the scenery and relaxation offered by Antarctica, alongside difficult weather. However, these points are only briefly stated, and the response does not explain the benefits or risks in enough detail to fully answer the question. The conclusion that both places are good for a holiday gives a general view, but your position on the trade-offs is not clearly developed. The response is also substantially below the required 250 words: it contains 133 words, with 17 words copied from the prompt excluded. Develop each main point with reasons and a relevant example, such as the health risks of extreme temperatures or the value of experiencing remote landscapes.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic overall shape: you introduce the topic, discuss the Sahara and Antarctica, and finish with a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “Firstly,” “However,” “Moreover,” and “in conclusion” show an attempt to connect ideas. At present, though, the discussion moves quickly between places and advantages and disadvantages, with no clear paragraph breaks to separate these points. Some links are also awkward or repetitive, particularly the repeated use of “as a result,” and the relationship between ideas is not always clear. Organise the response into distinct paragraphs—for example, one for benefits and one for disadvantages—and use linking phrases only where they accurately show the connection.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “historical places,” “secrets,” “activities,” “view,” and “climate change,” so the reader can identify the general subject of your ideas. However, the range is limited and several word choices or forms are inaccurate, which sometimes makes meaning difficult to follow. For example, “gratefull effects” does not clearly express the intended benefit, “colding weather” is not a natural phrase, and “enjoy with view” is an awkward collocation. Spelling and capitalisation also need attention, as in “shara” and “sahara.” Build a more precise set of words for benefits, risks, scenery, and extreme conditions, and check that each phrase sounds natural in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to connect clauses in longer sentences, for example with “because,” “as a result,” and “when,” as well as using simple statements. However, the range of sentence structures is limited, and errors are frequent enough to make some sentences hard to understand. Examples include “there are people who like discovering historical places in shara as a result they make sure,” where the clauses are not joined clearly, and “it can't be visitable” and “they can't be enjoying,” which use incorrect verb forms. There are also problems with articles, agreement, and punctuation, such as “both of places.” Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with one clear subordinate clause and check verb forms and sentence boundaries.

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