Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public.

Write a letter to the company. In your letter

• describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team
• summarise the benefits of paying for the concerts
• say how you think the company should spend the money

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Dear sir,

I hope you are doing well. I am writing to describe the essential outcomes aout childern interest and creativity in sport festival and public awareness about sports activities.

It is obvious that sport activities are the major aspects of teenager's life that lead to creativity, honesty and sportmanship. We all know that there is least interest in funding sports events by government and other authorities and providing proper faslities for young players to achieve their dreams. Because mostly kids can not afford the equipments of sports and may lose hope of being a good sportman. Surprisingly, your company is going to sponsor our local childern's team and look like they have achived a significan role in life. Because it has made them easy to manage required things like kits, bats, balls and so on.

This sponsorship is going to bring change in young generation to work hard and be confident to achieve goals and make decision consciously.Being a part of this team I am so confident and energectic and trying to give my best in making my team champion.

I really appriciate your contribution to local team, I want you to spend money on play ground because its condition is not good and there should be sitting for spectors as well . Many aged people prefer to watch kids while playing and there should be walking tracks around the ground. Especially, there should be dressing room and sports gala.

I hope you understasnd what is necessary to do exactly to make it worth it,

John Cater

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The letter gives relevant reasons for supporting the children’s team, including access to equipment, confidence, and opportunities to work towards goals. However, it does not adequately address the concert option: the benefits of paying for two open-air concerts are not summarised at all. The recommendation is also unclear and shifts from praising sponsorship to asking the company to spend money on improving the playground, without clearly choosing between the two options in the prompt. This leaves important parts of the task incomplete and the writer’s position difficult to identify. To improve, discuss benefits of both choices and state directly which one the company should fund, supporting that choice with relevant reasons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has some paragraphing, and the ideas about the team’s needs are grouped together, so the reader can follow parts of the discussion. However, the overall progression is unclear: the opening refers to a “sport festival,” the main body discusses sponsorship, and the final paragraph introduces playground improvements rather than comparing the two options. Several sentences begin with “Because,” creating fragments and weakening the links between ideas. The closing also does not clearly conclude the recommendation. Organise the letter into a clear sequence—team benefits, concert benefits, then your choice—and use linking phrases to show how each point supports the final decision.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response attempts a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “sponsorship,” “facilities,” “achieve their dreams,” and “contribution,” which helps communicate the general subject. However, spelling errors such as “childern,” “faslities,” and “appriciate,” along with inaccurate or unnatural combinations such as “sport festival” and “make decision consciously,” sometimes make the message harder to understand. Some wording is also imprecise: “essential outcomes” does not clearly express the purpose of the letter, and “sports gala” is not explained. Aim for accurate, natural phrases and check spelling carefully; for example, use “sports activities,” “make decisions confidently,” and “provide facilities.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

There are attempts to use longer sentences and subordinate clauses, for example, “Because mostly kids can not afford the equipments of sports and may lose hope…”. However, several of these attempts are incomplete or awkwardly connected, and the range of sentence structures remains limited. The standalone “Because” clauses are fragments, while “This sponsorship is going to bring change… to work hard” has an unclear grammatical relationship between the ideas. There are also errors in articles, plurals, and punctuation, as in “there should be sitting” and the missing space after “consciously.” Work on forming complete sentences, joining reasons to main clauses, and checking article and plural use. These issues sometimes interrupt the reader’s understanding.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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