Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public.
Write a letter to the company. In your letter
- describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team
- summarise the benefits of paying for the concerts
- say how you think the company should spend the money
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear Sir or Madam,
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Dear Sir/ Madam,
I am writing this to inform you about the feedback from general public regarding spending money on sponsoring a local sports team for children’s for two year or paying for open air concerts.
Rather than spending money on concerts, sponsoring sports team for children is a good option as they are still growing. They live in today’s sedentary lifestyle where everyone is busy and no one has physical activity. So for children it would be a good option they will
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response is significantly under the required 150-word minimum, which severely impacts the task achievement. Because the letter is incomplete and cuts off mid-sentence, you have failed to address all parts of the prompt. Specifically, you did not provide a summary of the benefits of the concerts, nor did you provide a fully developed argument for your recommendation. To improve, you must ensure you cover all three bullet points in the instructions and provide sufficient detail for each to meet the length requirement.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The text is too short to demonstrate a clear logical progression or effective paragraphing. While there is a basic attempt at an opening, the abrupt ending prevents the development of a coherent argument. Cohesive devices are minimal, and the lack of a conclusion or proper structure makes the flow of ideas difficult to follow. To improve, focus on planning your response into clear paragraphs: one for each bullet point, plus an introduction and a closing statement.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is quite basic and repetitive, such as the repeated use of 'spending money' and 'good option'. There is little evidence of a range of vocabulary appropriate for a formal letter. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more precise synonyms and collocations related to community support and corporate sponsorship. For example, instead of 'good option', use 'beneficial initiative' or 'worthwhile investment'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The grammar contains several errors, such as 'children’s for two year' (should be 'children for two years') and 'no one has physical activity' (which is slightly unnatural). The sentence structure is simplistic, and the incomplete nature of the final sentence makes it impossible to assess your ability to use complex structures effectively. Focus on subject-verb agreement and pluralization, and ensure you complete your sentences to demonstrate control over your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.