Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public.
Write a letter to the company. In your letter
- describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team
- summarise the benefits of paying for the concerts
- say how you think the company should spend the money
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear Sir or Madam,
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Dear Sir / Madam,
I am writing this letter to you in order to express my enthusiastic feedback about spending money on various aspects such as sports and concerts in my community. Firstly, people from privilege society will get a chance to fulfill their dream and reveal their hidden talent.
Moreover, famous personalities are also role models for numerous individuals who always follow them to get fame and success. Whenever, company will invest money on concerts, humans will get a chance to meet that figures and know about their personal life.That is why, your spending will work as an inspiration for humans.
I personally presume that my village is not fully developed. People still have to go outside for better education as well as medical treatment. So, my point is that if your company spend half of their money on that fields, it would be beneficial for all ages people. Thank you for considering my request. Keep looking to hear from you.
Yours faithfully,
Jyoti Sharma
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses all three bullet points, but the development of ideas is somewhat limited and occasionally off-topic. While you describe the benefits of the sports team and concerts, the final section suggests spending money on education and medical treatment, which deviates from the prompt's requirement to choose between the two provided options. To improve, ensure your recommendation directly addresses the choices given (sports vs. concerts) rather than introducing new, unrelated categories. The tone is generally appropriate for a formal letter, but the content needs to be more focused on the specific options provided by the company.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The letter is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices like 'Firstly', 'Moreover', and 'That is why' to link ideas. However, the logical progression is sometimes hindered by awkward phrasing, such as the transition between the benefits of concerts and the suggestion for education. The use of referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the final paragraph where the connection to the previous points is weak. Improving the flow between sentences would help create a more cohesive argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using words like 'enthusiastic', 'inspiration', and 'beneficial'. However, there are instances of unnatural word choice and collocation errors, such as 'privilege society' (should be 'underprivileged' or 'the community') and 'meet that figures' (should be 'meet those figures'). Some phrasing is repetitive, and the vocabulary lacks the precision required for higher bands. Focusing on learning common collocations and ensuring words are used in the correct context will significantly enhance your lexical score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('Whenever, company will invest', 'if your company spend') and article usage ('on that fields'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after commas and periods. To reach a higher band, you should focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring that complex sentences are constructed accurately without frequent slips in tense or number.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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