Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public.

Write a letter to the company. In your letter

• describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team
• summarise the benefits of paying for the concerts
• say how you think the company should spend the money

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Respected government Officer,

The purpose to write the mail is to articulate and justify my opinion on wheather to spend on sport activities for children or concerts. I personally think that it would be really helful to spend the this amout on off-springs team.

To make it reliable, it is necessary in this technological times for children to go out and play otherwise there could be a detrimental effect on their overall growth. As an example, when Youngsters are doing sports activity they get to realise, how to work in a group, how to lead a team.

Also, for the overall fitness of the youth it is essential as well to cheer them up with the funds give them new gears and facilities rather than just spending on a concerts that creates such a nuisance. Although it may increase the revenue to administration by gathering more folks and marryment time still, it is very crucial to give this funds to the new generations developement.

Yours Faithfully,

Kevalkumar Nayi

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response addresses the main parts of the prompt by touching upon both options and stating a clear personal preference for sponsoring the sports team. However, the treatment of the ideas remains limited and under-developed, which prevents the response from reaching a higher level. For instance, while you mention that sports help children learn to work in a group and lead a team, these points are stated briefly without extension or specific examples. Similarly, the benefits of the concerts are mentioned very sketchily, noting that they increase revenue and 'merryment' but creating a 'nuisance,' without fully exploring the community perspective requested in the task. Furthermore, the salutation ('Respected government Officer') misinterprets the target audience, as the letter is addressed to a local company rather than a government official. To progress, you should aim to fully develop each bullet point with extended explanations and maintain the correct tone for the intended reader.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic level of organisation with an introduction, body paragraphs addressing the prompts, and a formal sign-off. However, there is no clear overall progression, and the logical links between sentences and paragraphs are somewhat mechanical or inadequate. For example, transitioning phrases like 'To make it reliable' feel unnatural and do not effectively introduce the point being made about technological times. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as when pronouns like 'them' or 'this' are used without sufficiently clear antecedents. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal flow within paragraphs lacks smooth cohesive ties. To achieve a higher score, you need to ensure that every sentence builds logically on the previous one and that a wider variety of cohesive devices are used accurately and naturally to guide the reader through your arguments.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for the task, containing noticeable errors that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. You attempt some less common vocabulary, such as 'detrimental,' 'articulate,' and 'nuisance,' which shows an ambition to expand your range. However, there are frequent errors in word choice, collocation, and word form throughout the letter. For instance, phrases like 'the purpose to write the mail' instead of 'the purpose of writing this letter,' and 'spend the this amout on off-springs team' contain inappropriate collocations and lexical inaccuracies ('off-springs' is incorrect for local children). Additionally, there are spelling and word-choice slips such as 'wheather,' 'helful,' 'amout,' 'merryment,' and 'developement.' To improve, focus on mastering standard collocations and accurately spelling common words, while avoiding awkward phrasing that strains meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The grammar demonstrates a very limited range of structures, relying mostly on simple sentences alongside a few attempts at complex sentences that are often faulty. There are frequent grammatical and punctuation errors that cause difficulty for the reader. For example, subject-verb agreement and article usage are problematic, as seen in 'rather than just spending on a concerts' (incorrect plural article combination) and 'give this funds' (plural/determiner mismatch). Punctuation errors are also present, such as unnecessary commas interrupting clause structures (e.g., 'when Youngsters are doing sports activity they get to realise, how to work...'). To move up to the next band, you need to produce a higher proportion of error-free sentences, improve your control over complex sentence patterns, and pay closer attention to basic grammatical rules such as articles, plurals, and prepositions.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.