Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public.
Write a letter to the company. In your letter
- describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team
- summarise the benefits of paying for the concerts
- say how you think the company should spend the money
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear Sir or Madam,
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Dear sir,
My name is Rishab and I'm a general manager of the company. I want to convey a message and feedback about the scheme of sponsorship. According to my perspective I believe that sponsoring a local sports team for the training and new equipments would be a great opportunity for the team as well as your company as you can directly be the brand ambassador of the team which can really help you with the promotions. A few tickets to the random viewer of the match could really engage the audience towards the game and would promote your company as well. I think it would be very beneficial for the society and your company to spend money on public projects which will eventually be named after the company and be a part of it whereas it would create an impression on the local population towards you and your brand for helping the community grow. I really appreciate the efforts you are doing for the population of our area.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 3.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0
The response touches upon the main topics required by the prompt, such as the benefits of sponsoring a sports team and how the company should spend the money. However, the requirement to summarise the benefits of paying for the concerts is largely missed or confused, as the writing merges ideas rather than clearly contrasting both options. Furthermore, the role assumed in the opening is contradictory, stating you are a general manager of the company being written to rather than a member of the general public providing feedback. Ideas remain limited and under-developed, lacking specific details regarding the open-air concerts to fully satisfy all bullet points of the task in a coherent manner.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5
The response suffers from a lack of proper paragraphing, presented as a single dense block of text rather than a structured letter with distinct sections or paragraphs for each prompt requirement. While there are some basic cohesive devices used, such as 'whereas' and 'as well as', referencing and logical progression are faulty due to the absence of paragraph breaks. Information tends to run together, making it difficult for the reader to follow the transition from discussing the sports team to the public projects and overall feedback without a clear organizational framework.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully communicating the main intentions with terms such as 'general manager', 'sponsorship', and 'community grow'. There are some successful attempts at less common vocabulary, like 'brand ambassador' and 'engage the audience'. However, there are notable word choice and collocation inaccuracies, such as 'equipments' (equipment is uncountable) and 'viewer of the match' instead of 'spectator', along with awkward phrasing like 'According to my perspective I believe'. These minor lexical errors and awkward collocations do not impede general communication, placing the vocabulary squarely in the adequate range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
The letter features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating control over basic structures and attempting longer, multi-clause sentences such as 'I think it would be very beneficial...'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, including missing articles ('a general manager', 'the training and new equipments') and minor punctuation slips, but these errors rarely impede communication. The sentence structures show variety, yet occasional awkward syntactic patterns persist, meaning the text sits comfortably with a blend of accurate simple structures and occasional errors in more complex formulations.
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