Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public.

Write a letter to the company. In your letter

• describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team
• summarise the benefits of paying for the concerts
• say how you think the company should spend the money

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir or Madam,

Hope you are doing well. I am writing to express my thoughts on how your company can help the general public.

Many children do not get an opportunity for being a part of sports team, but your company can sponsor sports team and build a strong future for some children who want to build their career in sports. This is likely to be a huge opportunity for children.

On the other hand, most of the young adults who are financially independent and working hard spend less on themselves. And most of these people would like to go to concert like places with their friends and enjoy their time. Young adults who are pressurized due to work or other life circumstances if attend the concert, it may benefit them more to connect to themselves.

On the other hand, I personally think that you should spend money on sponsoring children’s sports team. Because for some underprivileged children maybe sports is their career.

I hope you would acknowledge my feedback.

Yours sincerely,

Sukhman

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address all three points and make your recommendation clear: you favour sponsoring the children’s team, explaining that it could support children who hope to pursue sport and those from disadvantaged backgrounds. You also identify a benefit of concerts, namely giving working young adults a chance to relax and spend time with friends. This covers the task well, but the two options are not developed equally: the sports-team benefits are mostly framed around a possible career, while the concerts’ wider community or company benefits are not explained. To strengthen the response further, add specific outcomes, such as improved access to coaching or a shared local event, and make the recommendation’s reasoning more fully supported.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter has a clear overall shape: an opening, separate discussion of the two options, a recommendation, and a closing. The reader can follow your main position. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or unclear. You use “On the other hand” to introduce both the concerts paragraph and your final recommendation, although the latter is not a contrasting option. The transition from the concerts’ benefits to your choice could be more explicit, for example, “Having considered both options, I recommend…”. Some references are also vague, such as “it may benefit them more to connect to themselves”; clarify what “it” refers to and what kind of benefit you mean. More precise linking and reference would make the progression smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the main ideas, with relevant expressions such as “financially independent,” “underprivileged children,” and “career in sports.” You also attempt to discuss social and emotional benefits, which gives the letter some range. However, several phrases are imprecise or unnatural, including “an opportunity for being a part of sports team,” “go to concert like places,” and “connect to themselves.” These choices sometimes make the intended meaning less clear. Aim for more natural collocations and precise wording, such as “join a sports team,” “attend a concert,” and “unwind and reconnect with friends.” This greater control of common phrases would make your ideas sound clearer and more appropriate for a formal letter.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mixture of simple and more complex sentence forms, including the conditional structure “if attend the concert, it may benefit them” and the relative clause “children who want to build their career.” The overall meaning is generally understandable, but some grammatical errors remain. For example, “Hope you are doing well” omits the subject, while “a part of sports team” needs an article before “sports team.” In “Young adults who are pressurized … if attend the concert,” the clause structure is incomplete; write, for example, “If young adults attend a concert, they may benefit…”. The sentence beginning “Because for some…” is also a fragment. Check articles, complete clauses, and punctuation when joining reasons to your main statement.

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