Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public.

Write a letter to the company. In your letter

• describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team
• summarise the benefits of paying for the concerts
• say how you think the company should spend the money

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I hope this email finds you well.

I am writing in response of the feedback your company has asked from general public related to spending an amount of money either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years or to pay for two open-air concerts. I believe utilizing funds to sponsor sports team of our area would definitely bring numberous benefits. As the team will compete at the national as well as an international level, winning the competion will attracts foreign funding and will motivate another children to participate more in such activites ensuring sustanable growth of the organisation in the long run. On the other side, if company decides to pay for organising open-air concerts, it will attract huge number of audience to watch the show, even pre-booking will create sufficient profit before concert. As the majority of the younger generation is addicted to the concerts and they save money to enjoy watching their role models or celebrities, even some crazy fans go foreign countries to attend the live shows. Arranging the same here in the local area will create a huge amount of money in the form of revenue. Moreover, I personally believe instead of deciding on one event, the company can adopt a balanced approach to distibute funds to organise both events, I also understand this will be a big investment but considering the benefits for the company's perspective, both are profitable investments and it will expand the business at an international level if company decide to continue funding these activities.

Kindly take your time to consider my opinion and hoping you will adopt the same.

Yours sincerely,

Emma

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address all three points: you explain that team sponsorship could encourage children’s participation and support long-term growth, describe audience and revenue benefits from concerts, and give a recommendation. Your position is clear, and the suggestion to fund both options shows some consideration of the company’s interests. However, the sports-team benefits are more developed than the concerts’ wider community benefits, and claims such as attracting international funding or expanding the business internationally are asserted rather than explained. The recommendation also conflicts somewhat with the task’s choice between two options, so make a direct comparison and state which option you favour if the company must choose one. This would make the response more fully developed and persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The letter follows a broadly sensible order: it introduces the purpose, discusses the team, considers concerts, and ends with a recommendation and closing. Linking phrases such as “On the other side” and “Moreover” help signal movement between ideas. However, most of the content is presented in one long paragraph, so the two options and your final recommendation are not visually separated. Some connections are also awkward or unclear, particularly the shift from concert attendance to fans travelling abroad and then to local revenue. Use separate paragraphs for each option and the recommendation, and make the relationship between each benefit and its result explicit. This would create clearer progression and reduce the impression of ideas being joined mechanically.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “sponsor,” “national,” “international,” “pre-booking,” “revenue,” and “sustainable growth.” These choices help communicate the main ideas, and some less common expressions show an attempt to be precise. However, several spelling and word-choice errors reduce accuracy, including “numberous,” “competion,” “activites,” “sustanable,” and “distibute.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “in response of the feedback” and “a huge amount of money in the form of revenue.” Proofread carefully and learn common collocations for formal letters. More precise wording would make your arguments sound more natural and professional without changing their meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex structures, including conditional clauses (“if the company decides…”) and a longer sentence explaining the possible effects of sponsorship. The overall meaning is generally understandable, but some grammatical errors occur in these longer constructions. For example, “winning the competition will attracts” has incorrect verb agreement, and “motivate another children” has a number error. In “if company decide,” the article and verb form are missing or incorrect; “I am writing in response of” also uses an incorrect preposition pattern. The final sentence joins several independent ideas with commas, making its structure difficult to follow. Break long sentences into clearer units and check agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries.

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