Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public.

Write a letter to the company. In your letter

• describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team
• summarise the benefits of paying for the concerts
• say how you think the company should spend the money

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am writing to express my positive response to providing financial support to the local children's team for two years. I would appreciate it if you could provide proper playground equipment to each juvenile for better performance in the future.

To begin with, I would like to explain that if your Holiday Inn company invests money in a local sports team, you will get numerous merits such as free publicity if the team wins in the future, which creates productivity and profitability. for the company. This is mainly because the team is directly or indirectly connected with the company. Consequently, sponsorship is not only beneficial for members of the team but also for company growth as well.

Furthermore, I would like to mention that nowadays, arranging training equipment and organized nutritional meals is very expensive; without sponsored money, it is next to impossible. Therefore, it is a marvellous idea for giving an opportunity to local players to play games without any worry about capital.

Finally, I would like to share that the company can make a flexible time arrangement, arrange excellent fabric uniforms, and provide a proper play area for young ones. Please let me know if any further information is required.

Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to your prompt response.

Yours sincerely,

Amrit

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

Your preference for supporting the children’s team is clear, and you give relevant reasons, including access to training equipment and meals and possible publicity for the company. However, the task asks you to describe the benefits of sponsorship, summarise the benefits of the concerts, and recommend how the money should be spent. The concerts are not discussed at all, so a major part of the task is missing. Some points about sponsorship are also unclear or not fully explained—for example, “creates productivity and profitability” does not show specifically how the company would benefit. To strengthen the response, address both options and make a direct, supported comparison before stating your recommendation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The letter has a recognisable structure, with an opening, paragraphs introduced by “To begin with,” “Furthermore,” and “Finally,” and a polite closing. These markers help the reader follow the general sequence of ideas. However, the progression is not fully controlled: the final paragraph lists possible arrangements and equipment rather than clearly concluding why the company should choose sponsorship over concerts. The opening also asks for equipment, which makes the purpose less focused, and the missing discussion of concerts leaves the comparison incomplete. Use one paragraph for each option, followed by a concise recommendation, and ensure each linking phrase introduces a distinct, relevant point.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for a formal letter, including “financial support,” “sponsorship,” “nutritional meals,” and “profitability.” These choices show an attempt to use more specific and less common language. Some expressions, however, are inaccurate or unnatural in context: “juvenile” is not a suitable way to refer to children here, “free publicity” may not be the intended meaning, and “excellent fabric uniforms” is unclear. “Flexible time arrangement” also does not communicate a clear benefit. Choose precise collocations that explain the intended point, such as equipment for young players, positive publicity, and suitable team uniforms. This would make your ideas easier to understand and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including the conditional structure “if your Holiday Inn company invests money … you will get numerous merits” and the reason clause “This is mainly because…”. Most of the message remains understandable, and the formal letter conventions are generally controlled. Some errors in sentence boundaries and punctuation are noticeable: “profitability. for the company” incorrectly separates the phrase, and “for giving an opportunity” is an awkward grammatical construction. The long opening sentence also combines a request with a purpose in a way that is difficult to follow. Review punctuation and aim for complete, clearly structured sentences; for example, explain the company’s benefit in one sentence and the children’s benefit in another.

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