Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Now a days people are living longer than ever before due to improvements in healthcare and living standards . some peoples have opinion that aging population creates problem for government and other thinks that there are benifits if soceity has more elderly people . In my opinion there are may be some disadvantages but there is more advantages of having elderly people that covers his drawbacks.

Disadvantages of elderly people are that if they are retired from government jobs , government have to pay him and take care of his healthcare and other basic necessities they need. State have to arrange a large number of staff in hospitals to take care of them , and increase the pressure on the hospitals means increase the expenses of hospital which govt has to pay and when there is two much crowded in the hospitals young generation becoming depressed which was not good for young generation. Consequently government have to face many other financial pressure.

on the other hand having elderly peoples have an great blessing of Allah and having many other benifits from them. Firstly the elderly person have spent his life , they are more experienced then us , they share valuable knowledge , his professional experience and practical skills if they have moreover through his life we can get too many lessons in positive way. They are telling us the way how we live and how we behave in soceity .if we have grandparents in our home they are taking care if their grand childrens and teaching him the lessons of life and as well as if parents are working they are people who taking great care of his grand children better than any caretaker.

In conclusion although aging people are creating financial problems for the govt but they have paid government in many way of taxes . but anyhow i can belive that benifits of aging people are more then their drawbacks .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both sides of the question and state a clear overall view: the benefits of an ageing population outweigh its drawbacks. The discussion of government costs—pensions, healthcare and hospital staffing—is relevant, as are older people’s experience, family support and childcare. However, the position is not consistently explained: the claim that older people have “paid government in many way of taxes” appears only in the conclusion and is not developed as a benefit. Some points also need clearer reasoning, such as how hospital crowding makes younger people depressed. To strengthen the response, explain and support the main benefits and disadvantages more fully, and make the comparison that justifies your judgement explicit throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on disadvantages, a paragraph on benefits and a conclusion. Transitions such as “on the other hand” and “In conclusion” help signal the direction of the argument. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow because several ideas are joined together without clear links. For example, the disadvantages paragraph moves from healthcare costs to hospital crowding and then to young people’s feelings without explaining the connections. References such as “they,” “his” and “them” are also not always clear. Organise each paragraph around a central point, use shorter sentences to separate supporting ideas, and make pronoun references precise.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “healthcare,” “living standards,” “professional experience,” “practical skills” and “financial pressure.” These choices show an attempt to discuss the issue beyond very basic terms. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making the meaning less clear. Examples include “great blessing of Allah,” “paid government in many way of taxes,” and “covers his drawbacks.” Spelling errors such as “benifits,” “soceity” and “belive” are also noticeable. Build a more precise set of phrases for discussing public costs and social contributions, and check spelling and word forms carefully so your ideas are easier to understand.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, including conditional phrasing such as “if we have grandparents in our home” and clauses explaining why governments face costs. However, complex sentences are often difficult to control, and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. For example, “government have to pay him” has problems with agreement and pronoun reference, while “the elderly person have spent his life” has an incorrect verb form and unclear construction. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also inconsistent, particularly where several clauses run together. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, articles and plural forms, and divide long sentences into shorter units. Aim to produce a wider range of structures while keeping each clause grammatically complete.

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