Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In many countries, People like mostly europe countries people living long time. Because people had daily morning routine and always gym. So from my perspective people long time ago.

If people long time living so many benefit for our society. If he older people living our society then its giving many benefit oppercuity for our children. Specialy giving advise for our work and telling about daily routine how to maintain your health and giving more advice for your skin. Because older people spend our life so older people had many advise and tricks for working. From my perspective if older live your society its good option for any suggistion you will ask any help.

In other we look some people say older people live your society its problams for governoments. Because older people always health problams so he had spend our life time. Its many problams for our society. But now days if we look people don't more spend time in older life. because now days people didn't eat any healthy food. So people didn't reached in older life.

Now i am telling now days how people spend time and whats eating and how much long live. And whats problams people didn't live long. One of the most biggest problams don't take care our health. If its any food any eating he didn't see its benefit for health or not. And the other thing he didn't for walk and don't take any excercise. Its very crucial for our health. I have also now days people eating fresh food and healthy food eating and daily walk and work routine.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response attempts to discuss both sides: it presents advice and experience from older people as a benefit, and mentions healthcare costs as a problem for governments. However, the answer only minimally addresses the central question of whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. The opening focuses on why people live longer, while the conclusion does not clearly compare the two sides or state how far the writer believes the benefits outweigh the costs. Ideas such as older people advising younger generations are relevant, but remain general and are not supported with a specific example. To strengthen the response, state a clear position and develop each side with concrete explanations, then directly weigh them in the conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is an attempt to organise the response into paragraphs, with benefits discussed before problems and later comments about health habits. Basic links such as “Because,” “But,” and “In other” show an effort to connect ideas. However, the progression is difficult to follow: the discussion shifts from longevity to older people’s advice, then to government problems, and finally to diet and exercise without clearly showing how these points answer the comparison in the task. Some references, including “he” and “its,” are unclear, and several sentences repeat similar points. A clearer structure—introduction with a position, one paragraph for advantages, one for disadvantages, and a comparative conclusion—would make the argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses basic vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “older people,” “society,” “health,” and “government,” and it attempts some topic-related expressions such as “daily routine” and “healthy food.” However, the vocabulary is repetitive, and frequent spelling and word-choice errors sometimes strain understanding. Examples include “oppercuity” for “opportunity,” “problams” for “problems,” and “advise” where the noun “advice” is needed. Phrases such as “people long time living” and “spend our life time” are also unclear or unnatural. Build a small set of accurate expressions for ageing, public services, and intergenerational support, and check spelling and noun/verb forms before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

Sentence structures are mostly simple, and the response attempts to use clauses with “if” and “because,” as in “If people long time living so many benefit for our society.” These attempts show some effort to connect ideas, but frequent errors in sentence formation and verb forms often make the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “older people living our society then its giving” lacks a clear grammatical structure, while “people didn't reached” uses an incorrect verb form after “didn’t.” Agreement and articles are also inconsistent, as in “many benefit” and “an older people.” Practise building complete subject–verb sentences first, then add subordinate clauses, checking tense, agreement, and punctuation.

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