Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In several countries, life span of people has increased than ever before. Although some people think that elderly people in a country create problems while others think there are advantages linked to an aging population. In my opinion, the benefits of having an aging population do not outweigh the disdvantages because it creates a financial stress on the government as elderly people are not productive for the society.

Having an aging population is quite beneficial to a society especially a family oriented one. Elderly people tend to support their children by babysitting their grandchildren. Furthermore, it allows them to pass on the values and beliefs on to the next generation. Overall, they help a socety to stay grounded and rooted.

On the other hand, there are several disadvatages associated with an increase in an aging population. Firstly, it puts a financial responsibility on the society and especially on the government. The government will have to set a specific budget for their shelters, meals and clothes in the form of pensions and small grants. There will be a need of old aged homes to provide safe space for elderly people who are alone or abandoned. Similarly, job competition will become fierce for unemployed younger generation if new jobs are not created specifically for elderl people.

In my opinion, disadvantages linked to an increase in the number of aged population outweigh advantages because of several reasons. If there is an increase in the number of an aging population, government should take specific measures to avoid stress to the society such as pension grant for each elderly person, construction of a number of old-aged shelter homes in multiple cities and free of cost treatments in government hospitals.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you argue that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages, and you address both sides of the question. The benefits paragraph gives relevant examples, particularly grandparents helping with childcare and passing values to younger generations. You also explain government costs through pensions, shelter, food and healthcare. However, some points are asserted rather than fully explained. For example, the claim that older people increase job competition for younger workers is not supported with a clear explanation, and the conclusion mainly lists possible government measures instead of drawing together why the disadvantages are greater. Develop each main reason with a specific explanation or example, and make the comparison between the two sides more explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on benefits, a paragraph on disadvantages and a concluding paragraph. Signposting such as “Furthermore,” “On the other hand” and “Firstly” helps readers follow the main direction. The progression is generally coherent, but some connections are mechanical, and the final paragraph repeats the position and financial concern without clearly synthesising the discussion. The relationship between job competition and an aging population is also not made sufficiently clear. Use linking phrases to show cause and consequence, and ensure each paragraph develops one central point before moving to the next. A conclusion that briefly weighs the benefits against the costs would create a stronger sense of closure.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “aging population,” “pensions,” “next generation” and “financial responsibility,” so the main ideas are understandable. There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “family oriented” and “rooted.” However, several spelling errors and imprecise or unnatural collocations reduce accuracy: “disdvantages,” “socety,” “disadvatages” and “elderl” are examples, while “life span … has increased than ever before” is not idiomatic. Some wording is also repetitive, particularly “elderly people” and “government.” Check spelling carefully and learn common collocations for this topic; more precise alternatives would make your argument sound clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a concession in the introduction (“Although some people think…”) and conditional structures such as “if new jobs are not created.” Most sentences communicate the intended meaning, but some grammatical errors remain. For example, “life span of people has increased than ever before” has an incorrect comparison structure, and “pass on the values and beliefs on to the next generation” contains an unnecessary repeated preposition. The opening “Although…” clause is also not smoothly connected to the following main clause. Review articles and sentence construction, and check that subordinate clauses are attached to complete main clauses. Greater control of these patterns would make the response more fluent.

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