Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

This is a modern era, technological advancements in medical facilities increase the life expectency. As in a significant number of countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some individuals say an aging population creates problems for goverments. While others think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. I partially agree with this notion, and I am going to give some reasons with relevant examples in the forthcoming essay.

On the one hand, proponents argue that elderly people facilitate access to more knowledge and ability to think clearly as they have lived a longer life. Moreover, an aging population also indirectly mentions the developments of a country. Hence, the country has better medical facilities, good hygiene, and reduce the mortality number. Furthermore, families with older people are most likely to know about their culture, customs, and traditions properly. To illustrate, in my family, my father's gradmother is still alive, and she told us a lot of stories about our traditions and culture, and helps my parents in arranging proper items for any festival or a cultural event. Thus, they are the main reason for managing each traditional event according to old customs.

On the other hand, people argue that an increased number in elderly people creates a pile of problems for goverments. Thus government has to arrange pensions and subsidies for a longer time period for a lot of people. In addition, in developing countries where government does not take responsibility of aged individuals, younger generation has to take care of them, that undermined them physically and financially.

In conclusion, increased life expectency not only has merits but also have some demerits. However, the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages. Thus, it helps in upbringing the history and customs.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both sides of the question and state a position: “I partially agree,” followed by the conclusion that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. The examples about family traditions and government pensions are relevant. However, the response only partially develops the comparison required by “to what extent”: the benefits are mainly cultural, while the disadvantages are described in terms of public spending and family burdens, without explaining why the former outweigh the latter. The claim that an aging population indicates national development is also unclear, and the conclusion introduces “upbringing the history and customs” without resolving the comparison. Develop each main point with a clearer explanation and make your judgement consistent throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs and a conclusion. “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” help signal the shift between benefits and drawbacks, and the family example gives the first body paragraph a concrete focus. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the link between older people’s knowledge and a country’s medical facilities is not made clear, and “Hence” does not show a logical result. The conclusion repeats the general position but does not bring the two sides together. Use linking expressions only where the relationship is clear, and organise each paragraph around one main claim followed by explanation and evidence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “aging population,” “pensions,” “subsidies,” “mortality,” and “traditions and customs.” This gives you enough language to communicate the main ideas, but several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, which sometimes makes the meaning less clear. For example, “elderly people facilitate access to more knowledge” does not express the intended benefit naturally, and “increased number in elderly people” is awkward. There are also spelling errors such as “expectency,” “goverments,” and “gradmother.” Aim for more precise phrases and check spelling carefully; this will make your argument easier to understand and more convincing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “as” and “where,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, the range is limited and errors occur frequently, including in sentences that carry important ideas. For example, “technological advancements … increase the life expectency” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “good hygiene, and reduce the mortality number” does not maintain a consistent grammatical structure. “Increased life expectency … not only has merits but also have some demerits” also contains agreement errors. Practise checking subject–verb agreement, parallel structures and complete sentence construction, especially when joining several ideas with connectors.

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