Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In many nations, individuals are now living longer than even before. Few masses think that aging population make problems for authorties. Others say that there are merits if society has more older people. Although there are many merits if society have elderly people because good experience and support the children, they have some demerits.

On the one hand, the main advantage of this trend is the better experience. This is due to the fact that elder people have good experience in the their whole life and when they give advice to somone its helpful to other because sometime their experience fully accurate. The second merit of this view point is the make strength of their children. To elaborate, elder people always support their children in difficult time and make their strength. If sometime children loose their confidence then older people give their life experience and boost their confidence. The third point is beneficial of parents that is upbringing of children. To justify, if homes have grandparents then do not need to keep care taker for children because grandparents best caring their children and they taught moral skills and ethics to children.

On the other hand, there are many disadvantage of this trend that is debt on the government. This means that if people live more than its negative impact on the country economy like give pensions and other medical facilities to elder people and its difficult to face all things for authority. Another demerit of this view point is the care of the old age home. This leads to its difficult to run lot of old age home because some children not like to live with older people and they leave elder people in old age home. So, its not easy to manage much caring centre.

To conclude, even though there are many merits of this trend, they have some demerits like debt on government and manage old age home.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both sides of the question by presenting benefits such as older people’s advice and help with childcare, and disadvantages such as pension and healthcare costs and the need for care homes. These are relevant points, but they are mostly listed rather than explained with specific examples or fuller reasoning. Most importantly, the task asks to what extent the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, yet your introduction says there are merits and demerits without stating which side is stronger, and the conclusion repeats this balance without giving a clear judgement. To strengthen the response, state your position directly and explain why the benefits do or do not outweigh the costs, developing each main point with a concrete example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “On the one hand,” “To elaborate,” and “On the other hand” help readers follow the broad organisation. However, the progression within paragraphs is sometimes mechanical, with repeated labels such as “the second merit” and “another demerit,” and some links between ideas are unclear. For example, the point about grandparents supporting children shifts from emotional encouragement to childcare without a clear transition. The conclusion also does not resolve the comparison established by the essay. Use fewer formulaic signposts and make the relationship between each claim and its explanation explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “pensions,” “medical facilities,” “confidence,” and “moral skills,” so the reader can identify the main ideas. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “few masses,” “make strength,” “debt on the government,” and “manage much caring centre.” These expressions sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow. Spelling and word-form errors, including “authorties,” “somone,” and “loose” where you mean “lose,” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise vocabulary for discussing public costs and family support, and check whether words naturally combine in English—for example, use “financial burden” rather than “debt” in this context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some complex sentences, including clauses beginning “Although” and “because,” and use conditional forms such as “If sometime children…” However, the range is limited, and complex constructions are often faulty. Examples include “aging population make problems,” “if society have elderly people,” and “if people live more than its negative impact,” where agreement and sentence structure are not controlled. Articles and plurals are also inconsistent, as in “the their whole life” and “many disadvantage.” These errors recur and can make relationships between ideas difficult to understand. Practise building accurate subject–verb patterns and complete conditional sentences, then check articles and plural nouns. Shorter, well-controlled sentences would help make your reasoning clearer while you develop more varied structures.

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