Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people thinks there are benefits if society has more elderly people. I think it has more drawback to governments.

In my opinion, the elder population has lot of drawbacks. People has both their reasons and also discuss the advantages of having elder population. But I think it has lot of drawbacks.

First of all, I have experience such elders which do not want to make their life easier by using modern technologies. If such type of elder remains head of the company in current era, company will collapse in no time. Some elders don't like and understand develop life style as they have experience poor childhood till their young age. Meanwhile, some families face number of difficuilties to manage their elders. Some elders behave their families like a dictator, which cause mental problems to both young and children. Some elder make thing impossible for both young and children. Moreover, in countries like Pakistan where the government has to pay pension to their former employee, a great burden on government. The other major issue was people with age 90+ need someone to take care of them, which is also the part of the government duty.

Furthermore, there were some advantages to having nice and intelligent elder which leads their families to higher positions. Such type of people have board mind and have willpower to upgrade themself with time, leads to success. older people will help younger to grow more quickly with their life experience. The young people achieve their life goal much quickly with the help of experienced and honest elder.

In my opinion, the government have lot of disadvantage with the increase in elder population.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is identifiable: you believe the disadvantages outweigh the advantages, and you give relevant points about pension costs, care needs, family pressures, and older people sharing experience. However, the response addresses the comparison only partially. The disadvantages receive more space, while the benefits are asserted briefly and are not weighed against the costs. Some claims, such as an older person leading a company to collapse or elders behaving like dictators, are broad and need explanation or a specific example. The conclusion repeats your view but does not summarise the main reasons. To strengthen the response, explain how significant each effect is and develop at least one benefit and one disadvantage with clear supporting detail. The 32 words copied from the task prompt were not counted.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic paragraph structure, moving from an introduction to disadvantages, advantages, and a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “First of all,” “Moreover,” and “Furthermore” help signal the sequence. However, the overall progression is limited: the first two paragraphs repeat that there are many drawbacks, and the advantages paragraph is not clearly connected to the argument about which side outweighs the other. Some references are difficult to follow, as in “Such type of people” and “which is also the part of the government duty.” Several ideas are placed together without showing their relationship. Organise the body around distinct points, use clearer references, and add transitions that compare the effects rather than simply listing them.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “pension,” “government,” “life experience,” and “modern technologies,” so the reader can understand the general subject. However, the range is limited and several phrases are repeated, particularly “elder population” and “lot of drawbacks.” There are noticeable word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems, such as “board mind,” “difficuilties,” “upgrade themself,” and “develop life style.” These sometimes make the intended meaning unclear or unnatural. Aim for more precise expressions for the effects of population ageing, and check spelling and word forms carefully. Using a wider range of accurate terms would help you explain the economic and social consequences more clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences, including the conditional idea beginning “If such type of elder remains head of the company,” and use clauses with “which” and “as.” However, the range is limited, and complex sentences are often not controlled accurately. Agreement errors occur in “Other people thinks,” “People has,” and “the government have.” Verb forms and tense are also inconsistent, for example “The other major issue was” within a present-focused argument. Articles and sentence construction need attention in phrases such as “has lot of drawbacks” and “a great burden on government.” These errors recur and can make parts of the response difficult to interpret. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then build longer sentences with clear clause relationships.

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