Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Today our topic was on aging population , their adventages and disadventages . First of all we will clear that having aging people means having our ancestors alive. If we took it in this way then there are number of benefits of it . It also had some disadventages of having aging people .

First of all we start with the advantages of having aging people . Having our ancestor is a great bless . As we get chances to learn our tradition and our cultures remain alive in our lives . By this our life feel cultural and traditionastic . As we follow our old tradition which we got taught form our father and grand fathers.Our life also feel full of love, wisidom and inspiration . We feel our life full of love as we may have our loves one alive . It also gave us inspiration by looking on their works and their sprit .

Now we talk about disadvantages of having aging people . First and the main draw back is if we have many aging people alive it can lead us to over population . Over popultion can cause multiple problem like shortage of food and resoures which as essential for our life . It can also make us less fearful form death so we do what we want .

Now in conclusion, Benefits and draw back both have same impacts and results on our lifes . So we were not be able to tell that any thing can outweigh the other

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You address both sides of the question and give a final view that neither outweighs the other, so your position is identifiable. However, the response only partially answers the central question: it does not explain clearly how the benefits and drawbacks compare or why they have equal impact. The benefits focus on family traditions, love and inspiration, while the main disadvantage is population growth and pressure on food and resources. These points are relevant but remain general and are not supported with a specific example or developed explanation. The claim that older people make society “less fearful form death” is also unclear and does not establish a convincing disadvantage. To strengthen the response, explain the effects on governments and society and justify your judgement with concrete examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “First of all,” “Now we talk about,” and “Now in conclusion” help readers follow the broad organisation. However, progression within paragraphs is limited, and the repeated formulaic transitions make the writing feel mechanical. Some links between ideas are unclear; for example, the move from older people preserving traditions to life feeling “full of love” is not fully explained. The conclusion repeats that both sides have similar impacts without drawing together the reasons given. Use clearer links between each claim and its explanation, and organise the body around a small number of developed points rather than a list of loosely connected statements.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “tradition,” “cultures,” “over population,” “shortage,” and “resources,” and the reader can generally identify the subject of each paragraph. However, the range is basic and several words are repeated, particularly “aging people,” “life,” and “love.” Frequent spelling errors such as “adventages,” “disadventages,” “popultion,” and “resoures” make the writing less clear and reduce the accuracy of the vocabulary. Some expressions are also unnatural or imprecise, including “a great bless,” “traditionastic,” and “their works and their sprit.” Build a more precise set of phrases for discussing demographic change, public services, and older people’s contributions, and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, including a conditional structure in “if we have many aging people alive it can lead us to over population.” However, the range is limited, and errors in verb forms, sentence construction, articles, and punctuation are frequent enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. For example, “If we took it in this way” does not fit the present discussion, while “As we get chances to learn our tradition and our cultures remain alive” joins ideas without a clear grammatical connection. The sentence beginning “As we follow our old tradition” is also incomplete. Practise building accurate complex sentences with clear subjects and verbs, and review tense consistency, articles, and sentence boundaries.

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