Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Currently, the elderly population in many countries living longer than ever before.Certain people believe that elderly population creates problem for the goverenment.However critics argue that having more elderly population is beneficial as they extend there services to benefit society with there experiences.This essay will discuss to review the effect of elderly population on society.It will be discussed, to what extent adventages of having an aging population reduce disadvantages prior to reveal my opinion, considering it as an advantage for the society, nevertheless,there should be a balanced proportion among all ages in the society.

The supporters of this notion believe that eldrly population with a wide expertise and experience is beneficial for the society because they share their knowledge and first hand experience with the new generation to get benefit from it.These life lessons provide the younger ones with authentic knowledge and skills without time wasting in exploring different ways to poceed.For instance,if novice worker is shadowed by an expert elder one will learn fast in his mentorship as compared to those who do not have such facility.

In contrast, critic argued that having more elderly population poses burden on the community because they become dependent and can not perform even the activities of daily living.This may lead to care-taker burnout which effect the effeciency of their families as well.For example, a person who look after some elder may compromise much of his productive work on daily basis.Ultimately, it will impact overall quality of life.

In conclusion, dispite having many disavantage of elderly population, adventages outweigh them easily.A balance propotion of all age groups in the society make it an excellent combination of updated knowledge and ex

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and state a position: older people can benefit society through their experience, while an ageing population may increase care responsibilities; you conclude that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages if age groups are balanced. The examples of an experienced worker mentoring a novice and a family member caring for an older person are relevant. However, the benefits are developed more clearly than the overall societal case, and the disadvantages focus mainly on family carers rather than wider government pressures such as healthcare or pensions. The conclusion is also cut off after “updated knowledge and ex…”, so the final judgement is not fully completed. Develop both sides with more specific explanation and finish by directly answering how far the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, one paragraph presenting benefits, one presenting disadvantages, and a conclusion. The contrast between the two body paragraphs is clear, and examples generally follow the points they illustrate. However, some linking is mechanical or awkward, particularly “This essay will discuss to review” and “It will be discussed, to what extent”. The introduction also combines several purposes in a long, difficult-to-follow sentence. References such as “This” and “it” are not always precise, and the conclusion ends abruptly, weakening the progression. Use simpler, purposeful transitions, make each paragraph’s main point explicit, and ensure the final paragraph completes the argument rather than introducing an unfinished phrase.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “wide expertise”, “first hand experience”, “dependent”, “activities of daily living” and “care-taker burnout”. These choices show an effort to discuss both social contributions and care needs. However, spelling and word-choice errors are frequent enough to make the writing less fluent, for example “goverenment”, “adventages”, “eldrly”, “poceed” and “propotion”. Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise: “extend there services” does not clearly express the intended contribution, and “reduce disadvantages” is not the right way to frame the comparison. Build accuracy by checking spelling and choosing natural collocations, such as “share their expertise” and “outweigh the disadvantages”; this will make your ideas easier to understand.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a reason clause (“because they share their knowledge”) and a conditional example (“if novice worker is shadowed…”). The main ideas are usually understandable, but errors in sentence construction and control are frequent. The opening is a fragment: “Currently, the elderly population in many countries living longer…”, while “Certain people believe that elderly population creates problem” lacks appropriate articles and plural agreement. There are also problems with verb forms and agreement in “a person who look after” and “which effect the efficiency”. Punctuation is inconsistent, with missing spaces after full stops and commas. Practise complete sentence patterns, article use, subject–verb agreement and punctuation, then proofread each sentence for a clear subject and verb.

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