Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some argue that the older generation creating problems for governments becuase at present, they are living longer than antisapated. Others argue that society benefit from having elderly people. I believe that disadvantages outweigh of having aging population rather than benefits.

Older generation is more experienced and mature than the younger people. Therefore, society benefits in number of ways from them. For instance, A company tend to keep older people for managing people and to make decisions for their future developments. Because of the experience they have in life and in employment are key factors for right decisions. Furthermore, a senior member of society has wisdom to lead a community to create better environment for everyone.

However, Negative aspects more compelling than having older generations. Their age require them to take more rest and tend to get ill quickly compare with a younger generation. A time away from work or responsibility is not ideal for a developing nation. That is a huge burden government and private secter is carring because of elderly. Even further, most government provide benefits for seniors. Such as cheaper bus fair, higher interest rates at bank services and many more. A higher population of seniors are more weight on governments. Further more, health facilities should be readily available for them to access. Therefore, younger generation are facing new taxes and regulations in order to facilitate elderly. Comparing with the benefits to the governments and to the society, disadvantages are more dominanet.

In conclusion, Even though number of seniors benefit the society with their wisdom and experinece, drawbacks overshadow the benefits. In the modern society, by facilitating comfort to the elderly could negatively affect others.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you argue that the disadvantages of an ageing population outweigh its benefits, and you address both sides of the question. The benefits paragraph gives relevant points about older people’s experience in management and their wisdom in community life. You also explain several costs, including healthcare, public benefits and the tax burden on younger people. However, some ideas are asserted rather than fully explained: for example, the claim that time away from work is a burden on a developing nation needs a clearer link to the effects of population ageing. The examples of cheaper bus fares and bank services are also not clearly connected to government costs. Develop these points with specific explanations or examples to make the comparison more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for benefits and disadvantages, and a conclusion that restates your view. The contrast between “Therefore” in the benefits paragraph and “However” at the start of the next paragraph helps signal the shift in argument. This coherent arrangement meets the lower-band expectations, and there is some progression within the discussion of disadvantages. To make the organisation more fluent, avoid relying on repeated transitions such as “Furthermore,” “Further more,” and “Therefore.” Some links are also unclear: “That is a huge burden” does not specify exactly which costs it refers to, and “Comparing with the benefits” is an awkward transition. Use clearer referencing and connect each consequence directly to the point before it.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “aging population,” “experienced and mature,” “health facilities,” “benefits,” and “drawbacks.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions such as “private sector” and “developing nation.” However, noticeable spelling, word-form and collocation errors reduce precision, as in “antisapated,” “secter,” “dominant,” and “more weight on governments.” Some phrases are also unnatural or unclear, including “higher interest rates at bank services” and “a time away from work or responsibility.” These issues do not prevent the reader from understanding the main argument, but they limit the range and control of vocabulary. Check spelling carefully and learn common collocations for public spending, healthcare and older people.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including cause-and-effect structures with “Therefore” and a concession in “Even though number of seniors benefit the society…”. Some sentences are clear, such as “A higher population of seniors are more weight on governments,” though this example also shows that sentence structure and agreement need attention. Other errors include missing verbs or articles in “Older generation is more experienced” and “Negative aspects more compelling,” as well as the incomplete construction “Such as cheaper bus fair…”. The final sentence also has an unclear grammatical relationship between “by facilitating comfort” and “could negatively affect.” These errors sometimes make individual statements harder to follow. Practise complete sentence patterns, subject–verb agreement, articles and punctuation, while retaining your attempts at complex structures.

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