Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Nowadays, aging people are the most category in many countries. There some individuals believe that is a big trouble for the society and other facilities, however others think that has more advantages, but it seems to me as an obstacle.

First of all, there are some some positive points when elederly are the most dominant part among the population, when it comes to calmness, they aren't much noisy because they can't be more energetic especially outside for example they are not able to shouting or irritate other people. The most of them could not make problems so they are well disposed toward others. moreover they don't have wide range of requests so naturally they wouldn't trigger problems to the government.

On the other hand, when it comes to economic or something relative to the country benefits they will be the biggest obstruction, because the majority of them cannot affect positively due to their age for instance when many companies want to hire employees and the old population are higher than adults so they will have a shortage in staffs and that impact negatively on economic rewards. In addition adults are the most essential part to the government since they can provide many services in order to build and construct their country growth as investing their knowledge to develop several facilities.

Ultimately, i consider that aging population cons affect more than their pros espicially in things that require physical power so i am one from the ones who do not support this age more than other.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You give a clear overall view that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages, and you include points on both sides. However, the response only partially develops the task: the advantages are mainly described as elderly people being calm and making few demands, while the disadvantages focus on employment and economic contribution. These points are not fully explained or supported with specific examples, and the claim that older people cannot contribute positively is too broad. The conclusion repeats your position but does not add a developed reason. To strengthen the response, explain more substantial social or economic effects, qualify generalisations, and support each main point with a relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph presenting advantages, a paragraph presenting disadvantages, and a conclusion. Linking phrases such as “First of all,” “On the other hand,” and “Ultimately” help signal these stages. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear, and several ideas are joined without showing their precise relationship. For example, the discussion moves from older people being quiet to their having few requests, without explaining how these points establish a meaningful societal advantage. Some transitions are mechanical, and the opening sentence is difficult to follow. Organise each body paragraph around one central claim, then explain and illustrate it before moving to the next point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “aging population,” “dominant part,” “shortage,” and “investing their knowledge.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make the meaning unclear, such as “the most category,” “other facilities,” “economic rewards,” and “do not support this age.” Spelling errors such as “elederly” and “espicially” also reduce accuracy. Some expressions are repeated or imprecise, particularly “problems” and “benefits.” Build a more precise set of topic-related phrases and check how words combine naturally; for example, refer to “the proportion of older people” and “pressure on public services” rather than using unclear general terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “when,” “because,” and “since.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and frequent errors sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “There some individuals believe,” “others think that has more advantages,” and “they aren't much noisy”; these show problems with sentence structure, missing or incorrect verbs, and comparison forms. Agreement and article use are also inconsistent, as in “the old population are higher than adults.” Punctuation and capitalisation need attention, including the lowercase “i” and the long, loosely connected opening sentence. Practise building accurate sentences first, then combine ideas using subordinate clauses.

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