Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, in many countries, people are now living longer than ever before because of better healthcare, improved living conditions, and a healthy diet, As a result, elderly people are increasing day by day. Some individuals believe that this can creates financial issues for government, while some alternatives argue that elderly people bring many benefits to society. For my perspective, aging population have both advantages and disadvantages.

One major problem of an an aging population is the increased pressure on government budgets.For instance, older people frequently need pensions, financial support, and regular treatment. Government spend have a large amount of money provide the services. This can create financial issues, especially between countries with limited resources.

Furthermore, young people do pay higher tax for support elderly human beings.After that, few workers are working for the country economy,when older people are retired.

On the other hand, elderly individuals have a valuable experience and knowledge, They can guide younger generation,and assist them to take quick decision. Moverover, their life experience can teach momentous lessons about family relationship,work, and social responsibilities.Consequently, elderly people play an important role in building a wise and responsible society.

In addition, older individuals can emotional support and practical help to their family.for example, when parents are working,this time grandparents can take care to their grandchildren. Elderly people can encourage to children extremely good habbits and guide them in their early age.

To conclude, having a large number of elderly people can creates problem for government, beacues some countries have not enough fund to spend on the older people health.In my opinion, government and young people should help to elderly people, because it can bring many opportunities for society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and give a relevant overall view: elderly people can create financial pressure, but they also contribute experience and family support. The body paragraphs include examples, such as pensions and healthcare costs, and grandparents caring for children. However, the position is not fully clear: “aging population have both advantages and disadvantages” does not say how far the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, and the conclusion mainly calls for support rather than making that comparison. The point about higher taxes and fewer workers is also brief and needs clearer explanation. To strengthen the response, state your judgement directly and develop the comparison with specific reasoning or an example. The response meets the required length; 11 words copied from the task prompt were not counted.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement, with an introduction, a paragraph on disadvantages, two paragraphs on benefits, and a conclusion. Linking phrases such as “Furthermore,” “On the other hand,” and “To conclude” help readers follow the main direction, and the ideas are generally grouped appropriately. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent organisation and shows some features of stronger progression. However, connections within paragraphs are sometimes mechanical or unclear: “After that” does not accurately show the relationship between taxation and the reduced workforce, while “Consequently” introduces a broad conclusion without a fully explained link. Improve cohesion by making each sentence build explicitly on the previous one and using pronouns or transitions with clear references.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “pensions,” “financial support,” “valuable experience,” and “emotional support.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “limited resources” and “social responsibilities.” However, several inaccurate or unnatural choices make the writing less precise: “some alternatives argue” is not the intended meaning, “elderly human beings” sounds unsuitable here, and “momentous lessons” is an awkward collocation. Spelling and word-form errors, including “beacues” and “habbits,” also reduce control. Build a more reliable range by learning common collocations for ageing and public services, and check spelling and word forms during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a reason clause beginning “because” and a conditional example about parents working. The main ideas are usually understandable, but errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries are persistent enough to limit accuracy. Examples include “this can creates,” “aging population have,” and “Government spend have a large amount of money provide the services.” The sentence beginning “Furthermore” also has an unclear structure: “young people do pay higher tax for support elderly…” A few sentences are joined with commas where a full stop or conjunction is needed. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and verb patterns, then proofread each sentence for a complete, correctly punctuated structure.

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