Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-07-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.0)

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people believe that an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. The advantages of this view outweighs the disadvantages.

For people who say aging people are a benefit to the society they do so because elderly people have lived an entire life with a variety of experiences. In those experiences they have made numerous decisions which have helped them to think through life wisely over the years. Having such experienced people in our society can be really beneficial as they can help making intelligent decisions on the basis of their experience. I remember my uncle once needed to invest some money for his children's future when we were kids. He was very confused whether where to invest then he asked in father who was around 60 years old. His father told him to buy some land in very remote area of our city. My uncle was very confused by the suggestion as he though that land could be of no value in future but ultimately he bought that land and now after around 10-15 years he was in need of money and when he asked the selling price of the land he bought years ago he was shocked to see that selling price would solve all his current money issue and also save some for his children. So his father experience led to him to make such a wise financial decision.

People also think this way that elderly people will be a burden on the governments. That could be in such a way that government has to manage more population of elderly people in old age homes and also have to manage their care centres which will be populated with the elderly people. In this way this could be a burden on the government. But I think most people can live solely on themselves as in Japan more population is of elderly people and they managed their lifestyle such that in old age too they are very healthy to live their own life themselves.

In conclusion, the benefits of having elderly people in the society clearly outweighs the disadvantages it can have for the governments as explained above.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. The arguments regarding the wisdom of the elderly are relevant, though the personal anecdote is quite lengthy and could have been more concise to allow for a broader discussion of societal benefits. The counter-argument regarding the burden on government is acknowledged, but the rebuttal is somewhat simplistic, relying on a single example (Japan) without fully exploring the economic or social complexities. To reach a higher band, you should aim to balance your arguments more evenly and provide more analytical depth rather than relying on a single narrative example.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'In conclusion' and 'For people who say', though some transitions feel a bit mechanical or repetitive. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the connection between the personal anecdote and the broader societal argument could be smoother. Referencing is mostly accurate, but there are instances where the flow is slightly interrupted by awkward phrasing, such as in the third paragraph where the transition between the burden on the government and the example of Japan could be more sophisticated.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express ideas clearly. There is an attempt to use some topic-specific language like 'aging population' and 'care centres'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are instances of imprecise word choice, such as 'managed their lifestyle' or 'live solely on themselves'. To improve, you should incorporate more precise collocations and a wider variety of academic vocabulary to discuss the economic and social implications of an aging population more effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is consistently clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'the advantages... outweighs') and article usage (e.g., 'in very remote area'). There are also some awkward phrasings, such as 'he asked in father' and 'his father experience led to him'. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on proofreading for basic agreement and prepositional accuracy would significantly improve the quality of your writing.

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