Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-07-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In current situation of different countries people have more ages then the previous one. Some people say that, these older people creating a number of problems for governments. At the same time other people think that there are more benefits for the society if the society have more elderly people.

On the one hand, people have more ages as compare to previous one. As the population increases, its a hardship for governments to arrange sources for the large number of population. In addition governments find it to difficult because they don't have much more resources for the management in case of any unexpected event.

On the other hand, some people believe that these older people are providing different benefits to the society because they have more experience in their life which they had sought through his entire life. They also educate the children of their society through different discussions. I know one older person who is living in my town. He is engaging in different welfare activities of my town. He also teaches some children in his house not for the sake of money but also for the betterment of their life.

In my opinion, its better for the society to have older people because they are the maker of the nation and also passionate to do work for the welfare of the society.

In a nutshell, different people have different views regarding older people, some have positive attitude and others have negative attitude. These older people providing more benefit to their society than the harm, so the advantages outweigh the drawbacks.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. You have identified both the problems and benefits of an aging population and provided a personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For example, the discussion on government resources is quite general and lacks specific detail or depth. While you provide a personal example of an elderly person in your town, the link back to the broader societal impact could be more analytical. To improve, try to expand on your arguments with more specific evidence or logical reasoning to ensure the ideas are fully extended rather than just stated.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use basic cohesive devices like 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'In a nutshell' to signal shifts in your argument. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the use of referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the phrase 'the previous one' in the introduction, which is ambiguous. The progression of ideas is generally logical, but the transitions could be smoother to create a more cohesive text. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer to their antecedents would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

Your vocabulary is adequate for the task, but it is often repetitive and lacks precision. Phrases like 'people have more ages' are unnatural and imprecise. You attempt to use some topic-specific vocabulary such as 'welfare activities' and 'management', but the range remains limited. There are instances of word-choice errors, such as 'sought through his entire life' (referring to experience) and 'maker of the nation', which sound slightly awkward. To reach a higher band, focus on using more sophisticated collocations and precise terminology related to demographics and social policy, and avoid repeating the same basic words throughout the essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, they often contain grammatical errors, such as 'its a hardship' (missing apostrophe) and 'they don't have much more resources'. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement and article usage, such as 'in current situation of different countries'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are noticeable and occur throughout the text. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, particularly the use of articles, apostrophes for contractions, and consistent verb tenses, before attempting more complex structures.

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