Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-07-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. Elder people whom are retired from jobs or made good savings are looking to spend their lives in peace and most probably in the areas they are attracted to when they were young. Society today have adopted a different way of living and find it difficult to live with aging people.

Aging people includes someone who spent his life to build a house and now he or she is looking to spend rest of their life in that house with their families in a specific land of the world. The advantage of having elder people in your homes or in your neighborhood is that you have a person who had spent his life dealing with different circumstances. You can talk to them for any situation that how he dealt with it in his life. One can use their expertise and might solve many of their current problems by using their advise. I had my father in my home who is eldest in our family. When I am stuck somewhere like in a social dealing, I instantly reach him. I simply discuss situation with him and ask for his advise. He simply give me a path which later I follow and many times, I get out of that mess easily. Having elder person is truly a blessing.

Some people today may seem worried about the aging population or elder persons in their homes. They thought of them as a liability. Like, government will have to build houses for them, they must be taken care of. The government also have to make hospitals or settlements for the aging people needs. Sweet homes are the results of these thoughts of modern society. The other disadvantage people discuss is that individuals retired from government jobs will be given pensions which puts financial pressure on the state.

In my opinion, having aging people in the society is truly a blessing. They are the role models you can look up to. They are the experienced individuals to whom you discuss your current situations and may find many solutions for a particular problem. They have the knowledge of society. They can guide you in many social matters of your life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the benefits and the challenges of an aging population. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While you provide personal anecdotes about the value of elderly family members, the discussion regarding the 'problems for governments' is less detailed and relies on general statements. To reach a higher band, ensure that both sides of the argument are explored with equal depth and that your position is clearly maintained throughout the essay. The conclusion summarizes your opinion well, but the overall structure could benefit from a more balanced exploration of the societal versus governmental impacts.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'In my opinion' and 'The other disadvantage', to signal transitions. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the use of referencing is occasionally unclear (e.g., 'They thought of them as a liability'). To improve, try to use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that pronouns clearly refer back to their intended antecedents. The progression of ideas is generally easy to follow, but the transitions between the personal examples and the broader societal arguments could be smoother.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'liability', 'expertise', and 'circumstances'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'social dealing' instead of 'social situations' and 'sweet homes' (which is not a standard term for elderly care facilities). Some phrasing is also repetitive, particularly the use of 'aging people' and 'elder people'. To improve, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and collocations, and avoid repeating the same phrases throughout the essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'Elder people whom are retired' (should be 'who'), 'Society today have' (subject-verb agreement), and 'He simply give me' (should be 'gives'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor errors throughout. To achieve a higher score, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of relative pronouns. Increasing the frequency of error-free sentences will significantly improve your score in this criterion.

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