Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-07-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In many countries , people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. I believe that aging people have experience, knowledge and contribute to society.

On the one hand, an ageing population can create serious economic and social problem. The government need to spend more money on their healthcare and pension on elderly people. It can create a heavy burden on government. The aging people of no work for the society as they are burden on government and family as they don not contribute anything.

On the other hand, the elderly people gives the experience and practical knowledge that can create benefit for the society. As they have good experience they can give good suggestions and a problem to the solution as they have good experience. The elderly people work as consultant, teachers and other thing where experience is needed. The

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response is significantly under the 250-word minimum requirement, which severely limits your ability to develop your ideas. While you have identified the two sides of the argument, the points are underdeveloped and lack specific examples or depth. For instance, the claim that elderly people 'do not contribute anything' is a broad generalization that lacks supporting evidence. To improve, you must expand your arguments with concrete examples and ensure you meet the word count to allow for a full discussion of the topic. The position is clear, but the lack of development prevents a higher score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay uses basic paragraphing and some linking words like 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' to organize ideas. However, the progression of ideas is limited by the brevity of the text. Cohesive devices are used in a somewhat mechanical way, and there are instances where the flow is interrupted by grammatical errors. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'in contrast') and ensure that each paragraph contains a clear topic sentence followed by supporting details that flow logically.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for basic communication but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on repetitive phrasing, such as 'good experience' and 'aging people'. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'a problem to the solution'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more precise academic vocabulary and synonyms to avoid repetition. For example, instead of 'aging people', you could use 'the elderly', 'senior citizens', or 'the aging population'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex structures, but there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'The government need to spend' (subject-verb agreement), 'the elderly people gives' (subject-verb agreement), and 'they don not contribute' (spelling/typo). Additionally, the sentence 'The elderly people work as consultant, teachers and other thing' lacks proper pluralization. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, plural forms, and proofreading for minor slips.

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