Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 7.0)
Opinions differ regarding whether having an aging population is beneficial or not. Although this development offers several advantages, it also has certain disadvantages. Examining both sides provides a clearer understanding of the matter.
One significant advantage is that older individuals have long term experience on several matters concerning society, thus playing a significant role in advising the growing population. For example, two years ago in Kenya during the post-election violence, the aging population played a crucial role particularly in advising the politicians and calling for peace and harmony among the Kenyans. If it was not because of their contributions, I believe that several people would have lost their lives. Therefore the government should appreciate their value although it might not be directly.
On the other hand, having an aging population can be problematic when it comes to healthcare. It is evident that their immune system has weakened making them prone to infections. Additionally, they need a special care or somebody who will help them in their routine activities including medication, cleaning and cooking. As a result, a lot of resources will be used by the government to support them. Furthermore, some of them might not be able to work thus depending on other people or the government for their basic needs thus becoming problematic to the working generation.
To conclude, while an aging population has clear benefits such as advising the growing population, it also presents some drawbacks including dependance and raising the government expenditure. Overall, I believe that its disadvantages outweigh the advantages by far.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing both advantages and disadvantages of an aging population. You clearly state your position in the introduction and reiterate it in the conclusion, which is a strength. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While the example regarding Kenya is relevant, the discussion on the disadvantages is a bit generic. To reach a higher band, you should aim to expand on the economic or social implications with more depth, perhaps by discussing the 'silver economy' or specific policy challenges beyond just healthcare costs. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments could be more thoroughly extended to demonstrate a more sophisticated level of analysis.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'One significant advantage', 'On the other hand', and 'Furthermore' to guide the reader through your arguments. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes a bit mechanical. To improve, try to use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that your referencing is precise. For example, in the second paragraph, the transition 'If it was not because of their contributions' is slightly awkward. Improving the variety of your cohesive devices will help the text feel more natural and sophisticated.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'post-election violence', 'immune system', and 'government expenditure' correctly. However, there are some minor issues with word choice and collocation. For instance, 'long term experience on several matters' is slightly unnatural; 'extensive experience in various societal matters' would be more precise. Additionally, there is a spelling error ('dependance' should be 'dependence'). To achieve a higher score, focus on using more precise collocations and less common academic vocabulary to express your ideas with greater nuance and stylistic awareness.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While your meaning is always clear, there are several grammatical slips. For example, 'If it was not because of their contributions' should be 'If it were not for their contributions' (a conditional error). You also have some issues with article usage and prepositional phrasing, such as 'need a special care' (should be 'need special care'). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on mastering conditional structures and refining your use of articles and uncountable nouns.
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