Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In recent years the population has become increasing day by day. It is true aspects. But some people argues aging population creates problems for authorities. Although some also believe that elderly people has more benefits in its society. This development offers several benefits; however it has also certain drawbacks.

One major advantage of the aging population is that they love all the children and also offer prayers for the young people. We should respect for their elder people and also we might talk to be in a very good manner. Furthermore, they don't creates problem for governments. On the other hand governments also provide benefits for their elderly people as compared to the young youth. They provide health care services for aging individuals and also gave pensions for their people. Governments protect their older people. They take care of them. And those people who has not daughter and son take care of them the governments make shelter for their older people and also provide food for their people. Despite these benefits, there are some disadvantages. The major drawback is that physical health decline, loss of independence and mental health also destroy. At the age of elderly, the people severe body pains and all depends on their own daughter and son. In young generation they don't take care of their parents and they don't respect them and not treat well for their parents. Many aging adults feeling lonely after losing their life partner. And also suffering severe diseases.

In conclusion, while aging population has some negative aspects, and some positive aspects. In recent people are now living longer than ever before.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt, but the development of ideas is limited and often superficial. While you mention both advantages and disadvantages, the arguments lack depth and supporting evidence. For instance, the claim that elderly people 'love all the children' is a generalization rather than a substantive point about societal benefits. Furthermore, the discussion on government responsibility is repetitive and lacks a clear focus on the economic or social implications of an aging population. To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-developed idea with specific examples or logical reasoning that directly answers the 'to what extent' aspect of the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. Transitions are often mechanical or misused, such as starting a sentence with 'In recent years' to introduce a topic that does not fit the context. The use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes repetitive (e.g., 'and also' is used frequently to connect ideas). Referencing is occasionally unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the flow of your argument. To improve, use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each sentence logically follows the one before it to create a smoother, more cohesive argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is basic and often repetitive, which limits your ability to express complex ideas. There are several instances of word-choice errors, such as 'mental health also destroy' instead of 'deteriorates' or 'degrades', and 'young youth', which is redundant. You rely on simple phrasing throughout the essay. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more precise vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'demographic shift', 'pension schemes', 'healthcare burden', or 'intergenerational support', and avoid repeating the same basic verbs and nouns.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede communication. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'some people argues', 'elderly people has'), incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'they don't creates', 'gave pensions'), and awkward sentence structures. The range of structures is limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and tense consistency. Additionally, try to incorporate more complex sentence structures, such as using relative clauses or conditional sentences, while ensuring they are grammatically accurate.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.