Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
These days, with the advancement in technology life expectancy increases in many countries. A group of people believe that old age individuals create problems for government while other opine that society has lot of benefit if there are elderly people . I am partially agree with the given notion and upcoming essay will shed light on both the viewpoints.
To begin with, the positive impacts of having elderly population is that older adults play vital role in foundation of family bonding. Old age people help family members to learn social and cultural value which connect each member emotionally to individual's siblings, parents and relative as well. The another important role of above 60 age group in society is that they guide and encourage younger generation through ups and downs. Elderly people provide guidance to adults about major life changing events such as career, marriage and business.
Moreover, old people also help individuals by sharing responsibilities. Older adults helps other family members in household chores and children care. Since, government provide pension to elderly people so they also assist in economy of family member. On the other hand, with the advancing age, old age people are at risk of array of diseases leads to increase in health and transportation expenses. It also poses a financial burden on government.
To sum up, older adults not only play key role in understanding of cultural and family values but also guide kinship to solve major life crisis and support family in household and budget related responsibilities.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The essay addresses both sides of the prompt, but the development is somewhat uneven. While you provide clear arguments for the benefits of an aging population, the discussion regarding the disadvantages is quite brief and lacks depth. The prompt asks to what extent the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, but your conclusion does not clearly state your final position, merely summarizing the points made. To reach a higher band, ensure that both sides are balanced in terms of depth and that your position is clearly maintained throughout the essay and reiterated in the conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', and 'On the other hand', which help the flow. However, some transitions are a bit mechanical, and there are instances where referencing is slightly unclear, such as 'The another important role'. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the overall coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'life expectancy', 'cultural value', and 'financial burden'. However, there are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'old age individuals' instead of 'elderly individuals' or 'older people', and 'guide kinship' which is not a standard collocation. To improve, focus on learning more precise collocations and avoiding repetitive or slightly unnatural phrasing. The vocabulary is sufficient to communicate your ideas, but lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Examples include 'with the advancement in technology life expectancy increases' (missing articles and tense issues), 'I am partially agree' (incorrect verb form), and 'Older adults helps' (subject-verb agreement error). While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your meaning, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall fluency. Focusing on subject-verb agreement, article usage, and consistent verb tenses will help improve your score in this criterion.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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