Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The question of whether elderly people are beneficial for the society or a burden for the government is a highly debatable topic among people. I am inclined to believe that there are some benefits of having more old people in the society but their drawbacks outweigh the benefits.

We can't deny that government faces a lot of burden of healthcare because of more aging population. Pharmaceutical companies need to make more medicines and drugs. More healthcare professionals are required for taking care of elderly people. There is a financial burden of having more old age homes.

On the other hand, there are some significant advantages. It include many old people start teaching skills after they got retired as they got more experience throughout their lives. This brings more learning to the society. Furthermore, older people passes their wisdom and traditions to the next generation. They take care of grandchildren and some even cook the food when the adult parent went to work. This results in better home and family environment.

Government should introduce more schemes to reduce healthcare burden. There should be many policies regarding health awareness. As if more elderly people engage in physical activity and taking good care of their health, it can reduce the disease risk in them. This proactive approach is better than reactive approach of making more healthcare centers for old people. Also, encouraging young generation work as volunteer to take care of the sick old people is an other effective solution. The prime example of this could be Chinese old people taking care of their health with help of old people communities.

In conclusion, aging population creates problems for governments but we can overcome it with help of many integrated approaches.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing a clear position that the disadvantages of an aging population outweigh the advantages. The ideas are relevant, such as the burden on healthcare versus the social contribution of the elderly. However, the development is somewhat limited. For instance, the point about elderly people teaching skills is mentioned but not fully explored with specific examples or deeper analysis. The conclusion is also quite brief and does not effectively synthesize the arguments presented. To reach a higher band, you should aim to expand on your supporting points with more detailed explanations and ensure the conclusion reflects the complexity of the discussion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. There is a basic progression of ideas from the introduction to the body paragraphs and the conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or repetitive. For example, the transition 'On the other hand' is used correctly, but other links between sentences are occasionally missing or simplistic. Additionally, some referencing is slightly unclear, such as the transition into the final paragraph. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the overall flow and coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing you to communicate your ideas clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'healthcare professionals,' 'proactive approach,' and 'integrated approaches.' However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are instances of slightly unnatural phrasing, such as 'make more medicines' or 'old age homes' (which is often referred to as 'nursing homes' or 'assisted living facilities'). To improve, try to incorporate more precise collocations and less common vocabulary related to the topic of demographics and social policy to demonstrate a wider range of lexical control.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('It include many old people,' 'older people passes their wisdom') and article usage errors ('the society,' 'the adult parent'). Additionally, there are some awkward phrasings, such as 'as if more elderly people engage in physical activity.' While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and article usage will significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.