Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Technology has flourished significantly in the healthcare sector. Due to advance medical equipment the life span is increases. People spent more than average compare to pervious decades. Thus in many nations, a lot of individuals believed that elderly people create challenges for the governments while others have different opinion on that they think there are advantages than drawbacks.

On the positive side, aging population are vital for every country because they has more experience and knowledge than young adults. They can guide youngster to make wise decision during their challenging and unfavourable situations. Nowadays, many young adult take decision impulsively, consequently this might lead them into bad condition. However, aged people thoroughly analysis the situation and foresee all the possible pros and cons before going to any judgement.

Nevertheless, there are numerous setbacks having to much population of elder ones. The primary drawback is scarcity of workforce. The older individuals are vulnerable they cannot accomplish heavy and technology related work similar to young ones. Younger population has more stamina, eagerness to work and they are also technogenic person so they can easily adapt new environment. As a result, it could impact on the growth of nation. Further, it also create burden on the medical system, economy and other various segments. The government have to allocate generous amount of funding in the geriatric hospitals because they are more prone to live threating diseases.

To recapitulate, it has more disadvantages than benefits. Every country should maintain equal population of every age groups. All the age people contribute pivotal to make nation prospect.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the benefits and drawbacks of an aging population. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention that elderly people provide guidance, the explanation is brief and relies on generalizations. Similarly, the points regarding the workforce and economic burden are relevant but could be expanded with more specific examples or deeper analysis. Your position is clear in the conclusion, but the overall argument lacks the depth required for a higher band score. To improve, ensure that each main idea is supported by a concrete example or a more detailed explanation of the causal link.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'On the positive side,' 'Nevertheless,' and 'To recapitulate' to signal transitions. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and there are instances where referencing is slightly unclear, such as 'others have different opinion on that they think.' The progression of ideas is generally logical, but the connection between sentences could be smoother to improve the overall readability and flow of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, such as 'unfavourable,' 'impulsively,' and 'geriatric.' However, there are several instances of awkward word choices and non-standard collocations, such as 'technogenic person' and 'live threating diseases.' Additionally, there are minor errors in word form, such as 'pervious' instead of 'previous' and 'increase' instead of 'increased.' To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and ensure that word forms are used correctly in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the reader's understanding. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('aging population are,' 'they has,' 'it also create') and incorrect verb tenses ('life span is increases'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are missing articles and awkward phrasing throughout. While the meaning is usually clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and article usage.

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