Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-11
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In several nations, the lifespan of individuals has increased and they are living for a longer period of time than ever before. There is a debate between the advantages and disadvantages of aging. Several individuals believe that aging inhabitants creates a lot of difficulties for the government but the other half have a belief that it provides a lot of benefits.
The advancements in technologies and the development in health sector has increased the life span of people. There are a lot of facilities available in this 21st century than the previous time. There are several disadvantages of an excessive increase in elderly generation. For instance- The government have to increase their fund for the more expenses made on the elderly people like, thier pension, their medical facilities and and many more expenses. These expenses are being made but there will be no profit or any return from this as they generally do not contribute much to the GDP of the nation.
There are several advantages also for the society to have an elder population. They can provide several moral values to the childrens. They can make their family happy by telling them stories about the older times or any motivational stories which can teach them some learnings . It can be helpful for providing jobs. For instance- with increase in pouplation of elderly there will be more patient of various types, so there will be a need for more hospitals.
In conclusion, there are several advantages and disadvantages of having a large number of older redidents . It is just a way of perspective such that people find it benefitial or consider it as a problem.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the problems and benefits of an aging population. However, the position is not clearly stated or maintained throughout the essay. While the prompt asks to what extent the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, the student fails to provide a clear stance, instead concluding that it is a matter of perspective. The ideas are somewhat underdeveloped; for instance, the argument regarding the economy is simplistic, and the point about job creation is not logically connected to the aging population. To improve, you should clearly state your opinion in the introduction and ensure each body paragraph directly supports that position with well-reasoned arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes disjointed. The use of cohesive devices is limited and occasionally mechanical, such as the repetitive use of 'There are' to start sentences. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the transition between the disadvantages and advantages is abrupt. To reach a higher band, you should use a wider variety of linking words and phrases (e.g., 'consequently', 'furthermore', 'on the other hand') to create a more natural flow between your ideas and sentences.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for a higher score. There are several instances of awkward phrasing, such as 'aging inhabitants' instead of 'aging population' and 'older redidents' (spelling error). The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, relying on basic terms like 'a lot of' and 'things'. To improve, try to incorporate more topic-specific vocabulary related to demographics and economics, and pay closer attention to spelling and word choice to ensure your writing sounds more academic and professional.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('The government have to increase', 'there will be more patient'), missing articles, and incorrect pluralization ('childrens'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of hyphens and spacing. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to lower the score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and proofreading for basic grammatical slips will significantly improve your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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