Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In many countries because of developed health practices people are surviving longer than in past. However, some people believes that old age people creates several problems for governments. While other believes that there are benefits if society has more elderly people. Apropos to given statements, I contend that both pros and cons have equal weightage.

To begin with, a larger elderly population can create pressure and problem for government. Old age populace requires medical services on regular basis as it is time when they suffer from several illness so for that government needs to spends much of their funds on healthcare. Furthermore, they even need to pay pension on regular basis and if old age people will increase in contrast with young that it will fluctuate financial system of government.

On the other hand, old age people have reached to this age after facing many problem. In this journey they have leant many things result they are well experienced. So they can share and teach their family. It believed that a if a family has old age people then its upcoming generation will be well disciplined. For instance , grandparents teach their grand children via stories and inserts values which are required.

On concluding note, I would like to address that increasing old age population can create issues for government but it can get solve by taking certain majors because having elderly people is beneficial for both families and society. As with their experience they can insert certain discipline and values in their family and society

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument, acknowledging the economic burden on governments while highlighting the social benefits of an aging population. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the point about the 'financial system' is mentioned but not fully explained or supported with specific evidence. The position is clear throughout, but the depth of analysis remains at a surface level. To reach a higher band, you should provide more detailed examples or logical chains of reasoning to support your claims, ensuring that the 'extent' of the argument is more thoroughly explored.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'On the other hand' are used to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and there are instances where the flow is interrupted by awkward phrasing, such as 'Apropos to given statements'. Additionally, the concluding paragraph is a bit abrupt and lacks a strong summary of the main points. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the overall coherence of the essay.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the message to be conveyed clearly. You use some relevant terms like 'financial system', 'medical services', and 'well experienced'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'old age populace' instead of 'elderly population' and 'taking certain majors' instead of 'taking certain measures'. The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on basic phrasing. Expanding your repertoire to include more precise academic collocations would significantly improve your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('some people believes', 'old age people creates') and article usage ('the' is often missing). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some misplaced commas and missing spaces after punctuation. These errors are noticeable and occur throughout the text, though they do not completely impede communication. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and proofreading for minor mechanical errors.

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