Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-16
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In many countries, people are living longer then ever before, which has resulted in an increasing proportion of elderly citizens in society. While some argue that this trend creates significant challenges for government, other believe it bring several benefits.In my opinion, although there are some drawbacks the advantages of aging population largely.
On the one hand, an aging population can place a heavy burden on government and the economy.As more people retire ,the workforce becomes smaller,which may lead to reduce productivity and slower economic growth.In addition ,governments must spend more on healthcare and pensions,which can put pressure on public finance. For example countries with a high numer of elderly citizens often struggle to maintain sustainable pension system.
On the other hand, there are several important benefits of having more old citizens in society.Older citizens often possess valuable knowledge , skills and experience,which can beneficial for young generation.This can contribute by mentoring, volunteering or even continuing to work part time.Moreover, many old people play a key role in familes and in society by taking care of grandchildrens and children of society,which allows parents to focus on their careers.This support strengthen family bonds and reduce childcare cost.
In conclusion,although an aging population can create economic and financial challenges ,it also offers significant social and cultural benefits.I beleive that with the proper planing and polices,the advantages of having more elder citizens in society outweigh the disadvantages.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The essay addresses both sides of the argument and presents a clear position. However, the response is under the 250-word minimum, which limits the depth of the arguments. While the ideas are relevant, they are somewhat underdeveloped. For instance, the point about 'mentoring' is mentioned but not fully explored with a concrete example. The conclusion is also quite brief. To reach a higher band, you need to expand your supporting points with more detailed explanations and specific examples to ensure the response is sufficiently developed and meets the length requirement.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'In addition', and 'Moreover' are used to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally mechanical, and there are some minor issues with punctuation spacing (e.g., 'benefits.In my opinion'). The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the lack of length prevents a more sophisticated development of the argument. Improving the variety of cohesive devices and ensuring consistent spacing would enhance the overall flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'proportion', 'productivity', 'sustainable', and 'mentoring'. There are some minor errors in word choice and form, such as 'high numer' (number) and 'grandchildrens' (grandchildren). The vocabulary is generally functional and allows the message to be conveyed clearly, but it lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands. To improve, focus on using more sophisticated collocations and ensuring accurate word forms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'people are living longer then ever' (than), 'other believe it bring' (others/brings), and 'proper planing and polices' (planning/policies). Additionally, there are frequent issues with missing spaces after punctuation marks. While these errors do not significantly impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. You should focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement, spelling, and basic punctuation conventions.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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