Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

living longer is not a problem but it can create problems for governments also by having elderly people in society benefits us.

elderly people have more exprience then many other youngers they taught us envirmental skills how to live how to manage our lives that no other person can tell us

having your elders with you is sort of comfort that someone is there for you and supports you when its needed whather its emotionly or physicaly .

but other way around some of us think aging is creates problems for goverments because the more aged people we have the more goverment has to pay them and i think thats why they think them as the peoblem.but not every county officals think like that.

I belive age is just a number a person who born live a sartain life .I remember one of my friend's grand-mother she live like 94 years she is the most humble person i have ever met with the knowledge she carries and how she rise up her grand child i can know that by looking at her the values and tradistions ans custom values she carries.

having her is a blessing.she tell me about the history how they used to live and told me the difference how people react and how we can tacal them. Although she was 94 years old she still seems more energatic and pretty good.

In my oppinion aging population does'nt creates problems but sloves the many of us problems and help us to understand the society in a better ways.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the benefits and problems associated with an aging population. However, the development is quite limited and relies heavily on personal anecdotes rather than broader societal analysis. The position is stated but lacks the depth required for a higher band. The essay is somewhat informal in tone, and the arguments regarding government spending and social benefits are underdeveloped. To improve, you should focus on providing more balanced, objective arguments and ensuring that your personal examples serve to illustrate a wider point rather than acting as the primary evidence for your claims.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear structure. There is no introduction or conclusion, and the paragraphs are not clearly defined, which makes the progression of ideas difficult to follow. Cohesive devices are largely absent or used incorrectly, such as the abrupt transition 'but other way around'. The sentences are often linked in a mechanical way, and the lack of paragraphing makes the text appear as a single block of thought. To improve, you should use clear paragraph breaks for each main idea and employ a wider range of linking words like 'furthermore', 'consequently', or 'on the other hand' to guide the reader through your argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, with several spelling errors such as 'exprience', 'envirmental', 'whather', 'emotionly', 'physicaly', 'peoblem', 'sartain', 'tradistions', 'tacal', and 'sloves'. These errors are frequent and occasionally make it difficult to grasp the intended meaning. The range of vocabulary is limited, relying on simple words like 'good', 'problems', and 'people'. To achieve a higher score, you need to expand your range to include more academic collocations and ensure that your spelling is accurate. Focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to demographics and social policy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('aging is creates', 'she tell me'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are run-on or fragmented, lacking proper punctuation. There is a very limited range of complex structures, and the errors are persistent throughout the text. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors significantly impacts the flow of the writing. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of tenses before attempting more complex grammatical structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.