Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In numerous state, individuals are today life is more than previous.some people think older generate issues for authorities.other say olders citizens productive for community.I strongly agree with that point of view that elders are good for state. Because they have a lot of experience in life.
Firstly, individual which are spend more life than adults do various things which mature adults not do yet so that we can take decisions easily by helping of our elders.like if a man want to do business of clothes but doesn't know what the fabric is best and which place good for buying fabric on whole sale rate than they can ask from forefathers for all things because they have spent more in people they know the best way.
Secondly, elders are the ancient of the populace because someone in house many things of youngsters parents not know but forefathers know due to they already going from this phase of life.For example some children behave very annoying but parents does not know why they behave like this without any reason but grand parents observe them and tell that what problem with the child due to they face already that problem with own children.so that they can help in the daily life of parents in that way they can hand children very easily and in effective way with the asist of grand parents.
In conclusion,many say elder good for state and some say not beneficial for community.But it's play vital role in the business and domestic unit.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by discussing the benefits of an aging population, specifically focusing on the wisdom and experience of the elderly. However, the task requires a balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages before reaching a conclusion. The essay focuses almost exclusively on the benefits, neglecting the 'problems for governments' mentioned in the prompt. Consequently, the development of ideas is one-sided and lacks the depth required for a higher band. While a position is clear, the failure to address the counter-argument significantly limits the score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate, such as 'Firstly' and 'Secondly' being followed by sentences that lack smooth transitions. Referencing is sometimes unclear, particularly in the second paragraph where the connection between the elderly and the specific example of child-rearing is somewhat disjointed. The conclusion is very brief and does not effectively summarise the main points or provide a final synthesis of the argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is quite limited and often repetitive. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'individual which are spend more life' instead of 'individuals who have lived longer' and 'forefathers' used to refer to grandparents. The phrasing 'ancient of the populace' is unnatural and incorrect in this context. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas clearly, and the errors occasionally make the intended meaning difficult to grasp.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'parents does not know'), tense usage (e.g., 'they already going from this phase'), and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or lack necessary articles and prepositions. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, they are almost always faulty, leading to a lack of clarity. The control of basic grammar is not consistent enough to reach a higher band.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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