Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Now a days a large number of people have higher life expectancy becuase of better facilities and healthcare systems. Due to this, I largely agree that aging population can cause for the economic instablility.

The prime reason is that older adults needs more chronic disease treatment and long-term care systems. As people grow elder, they cannot be able to cook and clean alone becuase their bones become and muscle get soft due to this healing takes alot more time. As a result, government had not only needed to adjust health care staff but also more budget is required to accomodate the older people. For example, japan has the largest life expectancy compared with other countries, which is causing for low birthrate.

Another important is that it can lead to limited opportunities for young people. This is because older individuals will enjoy the long-term careers instead of retiring early. In addition, there productivity also decline as they grow compared to youngsters. Consequently, young people have to wait longer for a stable career to get competitive salaries. For instance, computer science graduates are shifting towards freelancing because older people are not retiring due to which limited opportunities are available.

Some people argue

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you establish a clear position, the essay is incomplete, ending abruptly with 'Some people argue'. Because the response is unfinished, the arguments are underdeveloped and the task is only partially addressed. To improve, you must ensure you provide a full introduction, two or three well-supported body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You need to expand on your examples and ensure that you address both sides of the argument before concluding, as the current structure lacks the necessary depth to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay shows some logical organization, with clear paragraph breaks and the use of cohesive devices such as 'The prime reason is' and 'In addition'. However, the abrupt ending disrupts the overall flow and coherence of the piece. The referencing is sometimes mechanical, and the lack of a conclusion makes the progression of ideas feel incomplete. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence followed by supporting details, leading to a cohesive final summary.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There are several spelling errors, such as 'becuase', 'instablility', and 'accomodate', which detract from the quality of the writing. You rely on fairly basic vocabulary and some awkward collocations, such as 'bones become and muscle get soft'. To improve, try to incorporate more academic vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'demographic shift', 'fiscal burden', or 'intergenerational competition', and pay closer attention to spelling and word formation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'older adults needs' (subject-verb agreement), 'cannot be able to' (redundant modal usage), and 'there productivity also decline' (incorrect pronoun and verb form). Punctuation is generally functional, but the sentence structure is often repetitive. To improve, focus on mastering subject-verb agreement and the correct use of modal verbs. Aim to vary your sentence structures by using more complex clauses while ensuring they remain grammatically accurate.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.