Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Elders has been regarded as the most important assets of our society contributing to structured family and peaceful environment. An aging population is very helpful in taking important decisions of life and economic growth. However, different perspectives exist on this matter, I firmly believe that an aged people are blessings of God for us. They give us more benefits than harms.

On the one hand, supporters of the first view argue that an aging people cause problems for government. More pentions and allowances are required for their living. They are burden on our healthcare system as they require more medication to fullfill their health issues. They cannot actively contribute to the growth of society. Moreover, they also need psychological help otherwise they distrub the young generation by their unnecessary restrictions.

On the other hand, advocates of benefits of elderly people contend that they are protection and source of wise instructions for a family. They can make strategies for any business or firm from their experience. Therefore they are contributing to economic growth. For example, many organizations search an experienced and aged workers as experts. Many healthcare fields prefer aged doctors for complex and serious diseases. Consequently, many experts suggested that we should hire experienced elderly people for betterment.

In conclusion, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of elderly people. Although both viewpoints have considerable merits, I remain convinced that government should make a practical structure for working of aged expert for their living and country success . In my opinion, government make some regulations on the basis of their health conditions and experties for national success.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. You have identified both the challenges (pensions, healthcare) and the benefits (wisdom, economic contribution). However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding 'psychological help' and 'unnecessary restrictions' is vague and lacks sufficient explanation or a concrete example to support the claim. While the position is consistent, the supporting arguments would benefit from more depth and specific real-world examples to reach a higher band. The conclusion restates the position but introduces a slightly new idea about government regulations that was not fully explored in the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', 'Moreover', and 'Consequently' to signal transitions between ideas. However, the flow is occasionally mechanical, and some sentences feel disjointed. For example, the transition between the discussion of healthcare and the claim about 'unnecessary restrictions' is abrupt. Additionally, the use of referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the phrase 'supporters of the first view', which refers back to a general statement rather than a specific argument previously mentioned. Improved use of linking phrases would enhance the overall progression.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'economic growth', 'healthcare system', and 'experienced workers'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and minor errors, such as 'Elders has been regarded' (should be 'The elderly are regarded'), 'pentions' (spelling: 'pensions'), 'fullfill' (spelling: 'fulfill'), and 'distrub' (spelling: 'disturb'). The range is somewhat limited, and you rely on basic phrasing to convey complex ideas. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and ensuring correct spelling of common academic vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally affect readability. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('Elders has been', 'government make'), article usage ('an aged people', 'an experienced and aged workers'), and pluralization ('an aging people'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are persistent throughout the text. To reach a higher band, you should focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and article usage, and attempt to vary your sentence structures with more complex clauses while ensuring they remain error-free.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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